A child who is rejecting a parent because they are suffering from psychological splitting, in which the defence of alignment and rejection has been triggered in them, will shift from loving connectedness to contemptuous rejection with a lack of empathy for the parent they are rejecting.
Parental alienation is a disturbance in which a child rejects a parent without good cause. The rejection can range from mild to severe. In mild alienation, a child may share a parent's litany of complaints about the other parent but warms to that parent when they are together.
A child's rejection of a parent is a complicated emotional issue caused by many factors. Whether it's the stress of family upheaval, the malicious and manipulative behaviour of the co-parent(s), or the lingering effects of emotional trauma, there are many reasons why a child may choose to reject a parent.
Physical or emotional neglect from parents. They may not be intentionally abusive but were affected by their own vulnerabilities or limited emotional capacity. Physical, mental, or sexual abuse. Failure of a parent to protect/defend a child from bullying or abuse.
Psychologists call it individuation and, although painful for parents, it is normal and healthy for your child. As uncomfortable as it might be as a parent, your child's distance from you is actually right on track: the teen years mark their transition into the adult world.
Toxic stress response can occur when a child experiences strong, frequent, and/or prolonged adversity—such as physical or emotional abuse, chronic neglect, caregiver substance abuse or mental illness, exposure to violence, and/or the accumulated burdens of family economic hardship—without adequate adult support.
Emotionally absent or cold mothers can be unresponsive to their children's needs. They may act distracted and uninterested during interactions, or they could actively reject any attempts of the child to get close. They may continue acting this way with adult children.
Parental rejection is, according to Rhoner, the absence or the significant withdrawal of warmth, affection or love from parents toward their children. Rohner's framework proposes three dimensions of parental rejection: a) hostility and aggression; b) indifference and negligence and, c) indifferenciated rejection.
He might be going through developmental changes that surface as separation anxiety. Don't discourage him from feeling upset or make him feel guilty if he shuns dad. This is simply how he feels, and shouldn't be punished for them.
Hurtful and revengeful behavior
Says mean and hateful things when upset. Tries to hurt the feelings of others and seeks revenge, also called being vindictive.
Family dynamics, present and past behaviors, abuse, and perceptions of the estranged and the initiator of estrangement can impact separation length. Many estranged individuals question when there might be reconciliation. On average, family estrangement can last 54 months or 4.5 years.
Recent research indicates two types of children who are rejected: Children who display disruptive and aggressive behavior, and children who are socially anxious and withdrawn.
Narcissistic Parental Alienation syndrome refers to the process of psychological manipulation of a child by a parent to show fear, disrespect, or hostility towards the other parent. Very often, the child can't provide logical reasoning for the difference in their behaviour towards both parents.
Lack of trust
With an emotionally unreliable mother or one who is combative or hypercritical, the daughter learns that relationships are unstable and dangerous, and that trust is ephemeral and can't be relied on. Unloved daughters have trouble trusting in all relationships but especially friendship.
This may result in a condition called attachment disorder. It usually happens to babies and children who have been neglected or abused, or who are in care or separated from their parents for some reason. The effect of not having this bond is problems with behaviour and in dealing with emotions and new situations.
Reasons for the detachment may be due to intergenerational and personal trauma, an absence of emotional intelligence, mental health issues, substance use and abuse issues, fragmented problem solving and conflict resolution skills, and a variety of other challenges.
If your child shouts, “I don't like you!” in response to not getting his/her way, acknowledge his/ her feelings, remind him/her that it's okay to not like the decision and remind your child that you love him/her. Though this may not always go smoothly, the more calm and consistent you are, the better.
Traumatic experiences can initiate strong emotions and physical reactions that can persist long after the event. Children may feel terror, helplessness, or fear, as well as physiological reactions such as heart pounding, vomiting, or loss of bowel or bladder control.
Children who have encountered deprivation or harm before they were brought home lack many types of connections. They can lack social connections, emotional connections, neurochemical connections, cognitive connections and sensory connections. As a result, they easily become isolated in a world of their own.