Traditionally, a close friend or a less immediate family member (like an aunt, cousin, or mother-in-law) throws a baby shower to avoid seeming like the family is asking for gifts, but nowadays, siblings, parents, or even coworkers often host, and the expecting parents might even co-host or plan their own, though it's still generally uncommon for the parent-to-be to host alone. The key is that someone in the expectant parent's circle takes the lead in organizing the celebration.
Traditionally, close friends, cousins, aunts, sisters-in-law, or co-workers of the mother-to-be hosted baby showers. Because gifts are central to showers, having a member of the honoree's (or husband's) immediate family host appeared self-serving.
According to etiquette authority Miss Manners, because the party centers on gift-giving, the baby shower is typically arranged and hosted by a close friend rather than a member of the family, since it is considered improper for families to beg for gifts on behalf of their members.
Who should be invited to a baby shower? Anyone the parent(s)-to-be want there! Generally speaking, close friends and family are invited, and occasionally, co-workers, too. Make sure to consult the parents-to-be on their guest list, whether it's an intimate or large gathering.
Traditionally, immediate family was out of the running as well when it came to throwing a baby shower. But now, it's much more acceptable for any close friend or family member to throw a shower for the expecting mom!
Can a Mom Throw a Baby Shower for Her Daughter? Immediate family members traditionally didn't host baby showers, but nowadays anyone can host the shower for the parent-to-be.
But times have changed. Like many traditions, this etiquette rule is now considered outdated. In fact, it's now regarded as acceptable for a sister, mother-in-law, or even the guest of honor's mother to host a baby shower under certain conditions.
If you're worried that no one will offer to throw a baby shower for you, talk to a close friend or a relative and, if you're comfortable doing so, ask her to take the reins. But again, there are no hard-and-fast rules — if no one is available or you simply prefer to host the event yourself, feel free to do so.
Can the Dad-to-Be and Men Attend the Baby Shower? While traditionally baby showers have been female-only events, it's becoming more common to include the dad-to-be and other men.
A typical baby shower lasts about 2-3 hours. As guests arrive, they are offered food and drinks and they mingle. Once all of the guests have arrived and had a chance to enjoy food and drink, about 30-45 minutes into the shower, the games begin. There are usually 3-5 different games lasting for another 30-45 minutes.
Ultimately, baby showers surround parents-to-be with love and support—and a few packs of diapers—ahead of their new arrival. As long as that's the intention behind the celebration, in our view, there's no such thing as an unacceptable host.
On average, baby showers tend to cost about $500, though that total cost goes down when using a free venue like the home of a friend or family member and can go up if you're hosting a shower at a restaurant or venue with an hourly fee. Traditionally, the host of the baby shower will pick up the tab.
The average cost of popular traditions
In second place is baby showers, averaging at £1,994; followed by hen and stag parties, at a more respectable £979, covering the cost of plenty of hectic partying and late nights.
Can I throw my own baby shower? Yes! Hosting your own shower is totally appropriate in the new world of party etiquette. If you feel funny about doing so, you can always plan the party but have the RSVP's go to your partner or parent, so that guests don't overtly see you're the one doing it.
The cost of a baby shower is usually covered by the person (or group) organising it. That might be a close friend, a sibling, a cousin, or a small group who all pitch in.
Traditionally, the mother-to-be is the guest of honor at the baby shower. That said, if you're hosting a couples' shower, then you should list both parents as the guests of honor.
Sometimes referred to as the “Manshower” or the “Dad-chelor,” the male version of the baby shower has, in recent years, become a thing.
Best Foods to Serve at a Baby Shower
Savory foods like mini sandwiches, quiches, and sliders are always a hit, offering bite-sized classics that are easy to eat while mingling. For those with a sweet tooth, cupcakes, cookies, and other baked goods make for delicious and irresistibly tempting treats.
The Guest List Can Include Anyone. Most of us have heard the classic baby shower rule that only women should attend a baby shower, but more and more expecting parents are having co-ed baby showers so they can celebrate with all their family and friends (not to mention the dad-to-be!).
“We love your kids but thought you might like a night off. Adults only please!” ''We are very sorry, but we are unable to extend the invitation to children. We hope you understand and can still join us on our special day.
Should you open gifts at the baby shower? Tradition would have you open all the gifts in front of the guests. But, times have changed and it's more common not to.
Whether you go out and volunteer together for a local charity or public works project, or put together care packages in someone's kitchen together over snacks and conversation, you will never forget this special way you honored your last few weeks before Baby's arrival to give back.
In general, I would say that by the age of 8 or 9 years-10 at the latest-most children have developed enough of a sense of personal boundaries and body space that they no longer want to shower with a parent or bathe with a sibling of the opposite sex.
However, most people tend to land in the $50 to $100 range for a baby shower gift. Ultimately, you should give at a level that reflects your relationship but will not cause you financial distress.
Considerations For The Mom-To-Be
Pregnancy can be unpredictable, and energy levels can fluctuate widely. It is important to consider how far along she will be during the baby shower. Generally, the late second or early third trimester (around 28 to 32 weeks) is often ideal.