Stop all communication – take a break from social media, do not answer your phone or text messages from the narcissist. If the narcissist shows up, remove yourself from the situation and do not engage with them as it only gives them the attention they desire.
Even if you leave, the narcissist will demand you engage, interact, and provide them with attention. This may be through phone calls, social media, multiple texts, or showing up at your work or home. It is essential to realize that the narcissist will pull out all the stops to pull you back into the relationship.
One of the first things that happen to an Empath when they leave a relationship with a Narcissist is that they will deeply fear that they are a narcissist themselves. Taking a step toward yourself by acknowledging what you need and letting go of the idea that it's all your fault will feel selfish and wrong.
The narcissist is able to keep the empath in a cycle of emotional or physical abuse and continue to demoralize the empath and use them as the scapegoat for their own dysfunctional feelings. Empaths tend to internalize feelings and accept blame.
But eventually, if the empath decides not to return to the relationship, the narcissist will move on. This can be difficult for both individuals. An empath may wonder if they were the ones that overreacted, or feel guilty that they “gave up” on their partner.
The relationship cycle typical of extreme narcissistic abuse generally follows a pattern. Individuals in emotionally abusive relationships experience a dizzying whirlwind that includes three stages: idealization, devaluing, and discarding.
Leaving a narcissist is similar to breaking a heroin addiction. It is painful and difficult, but in the end, you get your life back. In order to get yourself through the hardest parts of the initial break, you must allow yourself to experience the discomfort and anxiety, and let yourself grieve your loss.
You're naïve. Narcissists use a range of emotionally manipulative behaviours in their relationships. If you're not this kind of person and are more naïve in nature, you may simply be drawn into relationships with narcissists because you lack the ability to recognise what they are up to in the early stages.
Fear of being alone – Narcissists are skilled at destroying their partner's social circles and relationships with family members. The prospect of leaving may equate to a feeling of being truly alone; Fear of reprisals – The narcissist may have created a culture of fear and anxiety in their partner's life.
As a result, their charming, charismatic, confident, and articulate personality begins to disintegrate and they are left feeling unlovable, undesirable, inadequate, worthless, and weak. This is why discarding a narcissist makes them feel rejected, humiliated, and abandoned.
How Did Narcissists Feel About the Breakup? Both narcissistic admiration and narcissistic rivalry were related to feeling more anger right after the breakup. This is consistent with the tendency for narcissists to be especially hostile when they're rejected.
The emotional hangover when we're undergoing recovery from a narcissistic relationship is typically profound sadness and secondary to this feeling is rage. Rage that someone who professed to love you could suddenly turn around and treat you so entirely without empathy. The rage quite often is disguised as depression.
They WILL move on quickly because narcissists tend to view other people (including their partners) as conveniences — and once you are no longer useful, they will move on.
Narcissists hate losing their supply, so they won't let you go easily. Prepare for them to promise "to change." They might suddenly start doing things for you that you'd been complaining about. They may say "you'll be lost without me," or "you'll never find someone like me."
After a breakup, a narcissist will use manipulation tactics to protect their grandiose sense of self, soothe their fears of abandonment, and to regulate the painful thoughts, feelings, and emotions that they struggle with.
Maintaining a relationship with a narcissist can be difficult due to their excessive need for admiration, harsh criticism, lack of empathy and deep insecurities. If your partner is not willing to work on their narcissistic traits, then leaving is probably the best thing you can do for your mental health.
Do narcissists regret discarding or losing someone? It is common for people with a narcissistic personality disorder to regret discarding or losing someone, but it does not mean what you might think. If they feel regret, it is not because they hurt you. It is for losing something that they value.
Once they don't need you to fuel their ego anymore, a narcissist will discard and abandon you. Also, if you decide to stand for yourself, set boundaries, and ask for reciprocity, a narcissist will discard you with no apology, empathy, or remorse.
The Call of the Caretaker
If you are a caring compassionate person, it is natural to feel sorry for others who suffer, including the narcissist. If you're especially empathetic, it is your “normal” to feel others' pain and to try to caretake them on the road toward peace and happiness.
Narcissists are hurt by challenges or threats to their superior and grandiose self-image (also known as narcissistic injury). Their sense of entitlement and lack of empathy means they will attempt to destroy the culprit by any means necessary.