8 Triggers of a Narcissist's Rage They feel that they've been criticized, even if the critique is constructive or said kindly. They're not the center of attention. They're caught breaking rules or not respecting boundaries. They're held accountable for their actions.
Deep-Seated Fear of Rejection / Being Unimportant – This is the core of narcissistic rage. Many narcissists are constantly hounded by the insecurity that people may not see them as the privileged, powerful, popular, or “special” individuals they make themselves to be, and react intensely when their fears are confirmed.
Although narcissists act superior, entitled and boastful, underneath their larger-than-life facade lies their greatest fear: That they are ordinary. For narcissists, attention is like oxygen. Narcissists believe only special people get attention.
For the narcissist, there is no way out of emotional turmoil except to discharge their negative feelings onto someone else, and that “someone else” is usually a person inside their own home or in their work environment—but never a superior. (They play emotional chess for a living; they aren't fools.)
8 Triggers of a Narcissist's Rage
They don't get their way, even if what they want is unreasonable. They feel that they've been criticized, even if the critique is constructive or said kindly. They're not the center of attention. They're caught breaking rules or not respecting boundaries.
Narcissists can feel emotional pain, but not usually in the same way as others. The emotional pain they may feel is usually related to underlying selfish needs. Underneath the displays of superiority and sense of entitlement, they often feel empty, powerless, and shameful, which they perceive as weakness.
A monumental weakness in the narcissist is the failure to look internally and flesh out what needs to be worked on. Then, of course, the next step is to spend time improving. The narcissist sabotages any possibility of looking deep within.
They get jealous about everything
They talk a good game, but narcissists actually have very low self-esteem. Low self-worth/confidence/esteem is at the core of a narcissism. This low sense of self naturally makes it extremely easy for them to become jealous – very jealous.
Being Humiliated
Being at once grandiose and hypersensitive, narcissists have unrealistic expectations and are threatened by even small slights that others would easily brush off. Feeling embarrassed or humiliated is painful for anyone, but narcissists are especially reactive to those emotions.
Narcissism tends to emerge as a psychological defence in response to excessive levels of parental criticism, abuse or neglect in early life. Narcissistic personalities tend to be formed by emotional injury as a result of overwhelming shame, loss or deprivation during childhood.
Here are some narcissism red flags to look out for: Lacking empathy. They seem unable or unwilling to have empathy for others, and they appear to have no desire for emotional intimacy. Unrealistic sense of entitlement.
Narcissists can also feel guilt for how happy and relieved they feel now that they're dead. A narcissist generally experiences a cycle of reverting to being a child before growing up and growing through their grief.
Common narcissistic traits include having a strong sense of self-importance, experiencing fantasies about fame or glory, exaggerating self abilities, craving admiration, exploiting others, and lacking empathy.
Usually, the empath believes (often subconsciously) they can heal and help the narcissist, so they pour themselves into showing the narcissist their worth, but the narcissist never will see it. The narcissist in this position will take advantage of the empath and see their compassion as weakness.
Narcissists generally lack empathy for other people's feelings, so they won't understand where you're coming from. That's why it's so important to be consistent! The more consistent you are, the more miserable it will make the narcissist. They hate feeling like they can't get away with whatever they want.
Instead, a narcissistic injury, aka “narcissistic wound,” is what some people with NPD might feel when they encounter criticism, loss, or perceived abandonment. Even though they may not show it, they may experience humiliation and rejection.