Unhelpful guests are rarely invited back. Things you should offer to do: Help prep or cook meals; set the table and do the dishes; offer to drive; occupy the kids while their parents take a well-deserved nap; fix a little something around the house if you have the skills; or take the dog for a walk.
It's polite to comment on a friend's home when you visit, so long as it's along the lines of “What a gorgeous place”. It's also fine to ask questions, but there are boundaries. “Where did you find those lovely cushions?” is great. “How much did that huge TV cost?” is a bit more awkward.
Dr. Paul Hokemeyer has a practice specializing in marriage and family counseling based in New York City. He maintains that the ideal amount of time for a stay is "three days and two nights. Anything over a week will be too exhausting and stressful for everyone — host and guest.
So if you say yes to houseguests, have a pre-visit dialogue. Clarify visit limits such as length of time, sleeping arrangements, your availability to entertain them or drive them around, or financial restraints that limit your ability to go sight-seeing, provide food and meals, and so on.
Give them chores.
If a guest has truly overstayed their welcome, let them know they ought to start pitching in around the house. Have them pick up after themselves, and suggest they do a fair share of the dishes and the tidying up. At worst you've a new helper around the house.
Never arrive empty-handed.
Give a hostess gift that fits with your particular weekend scenario. If you visit a friend from college for a long weekend, you can bring a nice bottle of wine and a cheese board.
The bedroom is one of the most personal and private areas of our homes, which is why you should stay clear of it unless you are invited in. Sticking to communal areas such as the living room, kitchen and bathrooms will ensure that you don't risk overstepping the mark and making your host feel uncomfortable.
Be honest: Let them know you changed your mind and the reasons why. Offer alternatives: If possible, make suggestions for alternative arrangements. Apologize: Let them know you're sorry for the inconvenience caused.
In sum, rarely are unannounced visitors a nice surprise. You will almost always burden your hosts, even if it's just with awkwardness. Anyone with a speckling of social awareness should be able to take 20 seconds out of their (obviously unoccupied) day to send a text warning first.
Whether you're welcoming your new neighbors or celebrating your best friend's first home, offering a housewarming gift is a thoughtful way to say congratulations. Consider bringing a present that will make their space feel more like home, such as a picture frame or personalized hand towels.
Welcome your friends.
When they arrive smile, and say "hi", then let them come in. Be polite and friendly, and make sure to ask them how they are. Introduce your friends to people in the household they don't yet know. Offer compliments on how they look and offer gratitude for any gifts that they bring with them.
While it's not illegal for them to share, it's recommended that children over the age of 10 should have their own bedrooms – even if they're siblings or step-siblings. We know this isn't always possible. If kids are sharing, try to have regular conversations with them about how they're feeling.
The biggest no-nos here are regarding the bathroom and common areas. Don't leave makeup scattered on the counter or wet towels on the floor—especially if sharing a bathroom with another room or guest. Otherwise, always pick up after yourself and not leave clothing and other clutter in the common areas of the house.
The key to an intimate mood is incorporating various sources of lighting, including soft bedside lamps and strategically mounted ceiling lights for a touch of drama. But of course, the best light source of them all will forever be natural light. See below for what our dream bedroom would be.
"Some of my personal favorites are paper cocktail napkins, a tin of Louis Sherry chocolates, or a unique candle," recommends Strait. "It is fun to bring something the host might not pick up for themselves! A gift for a host does not have to break the bank, it just shows you appreciate them for hosting."
We agree that asking the question before accepting an invitation is not polite and gives the impression that you need to be convinced the party is worth your time.
It is quite impolite to clean the home of another person if you do not have a particularly close and positive connection with that person. Each of us holds ourselves to a different standard. Some people are neat yet leave messes, while others are orderly but bring in dirt.
Be Honest Upfront
This can be done using a number of phrases like: “Sorry! We don't have the space for houseguests at the moment” “Unfortunately we're unable to host any guests right now”