Borderline personality disorder is characterized by a pervasive pattern of instability in relationships, self-image, moods, and behavior and hypersensitivity to possible rejection and abandonment. People with borderline personality disorder fear rejection and abandonment, partly because they do not want to be alone.
Push/Pull behaviors
Pulling someone into a close relationship and then pushing that person away repeatedly is one of the most well-known symptoms of BPD. It causes the person in question to be confused about where they stand in the relationship.
You may push people away because you don't feel like you're worth others' time and energy. This problem relates to low self esteem and self compassion. Low self esteem can stem from other mental health struggles, like depression or anxiety. It can also trace back to your childhood, when your inner voice was shaped.
A person who is socially withdrawn removes themselves from encounters and interactions with others. There are many reasons why people may choose not to connect with others, including anxiety, fear, shame, vulnerability, potential rejection, and more. It can be a reflection of an underlying mental health condition.
So pushing people away becomes a defense mechanism to keep people from being too close - where they can feel hurt. Often, the triggering of old trauma wounds ignites a sense of being overwhelmed. People become flooded with feelings of anxiety and may experience panic attacks.
This response can be harmful, which is why it's important to understand why they push you away and what to do about it. Depressed partners push those closest to them away as a defense mechanism for various reasons, like feeling more comfortable alone or not having the energy to keep up with you.
Social withdrawal is avoiding people and activities you would usually enjoy. For some people, this can progress to a point of social isolation, where you may even want to avoid contact with family and close friends and just be by yourself most of the time.
Cognitive decline and social withdrawal are central features of the premorbid deficits that emerge during the prodrome schizophrenic illness (4-9), and these symptoms contribute to poor outcomes (10-12).
There's generally a valid reason why we start pushing away those we love: Trauma, breakups, or mental health crises reduce our sense of self-worth. We fear rejection, leading us to avoid the risk of emotionally investing in people. Our behavior changes.
"There are many reasons why drifts take place: from a move/relocation to a friend getting married and/or having a baby to simply being busy. Friendships ebb and flow so any change or life event can cause some type of drift (big or small).
BPD splitting ruins relationships since the person can misconstrue the behaviours of others when their feelings are brought up in the relationship. Often, the borderline person is unaware of how they feel when their feelings surface, so they displace their feelings onto others as causing them.
Borderline personality disorder is a mental illness that severely impacts a person's ability to manage their emotions. This loss of emotional control can increase impulsivity, affect how a person feels about themselves, and negatively impact their relationships with others.
Fear of abandonment
People with borderline personality disorder fear abandonment, partly because they do not want to be alone. Sometimes they feel that they do not exist at all, often when they do not have someone who cares for them. They often feel empty inside.
Isolation is a result of anxiety and depression in that some individuals use it as a self-induced coping mechanism to deal with excessive worry and avoid human interaction.
For example, a person's isolation may be a sign of depression or an anxiety disorder. In addition to identifying underlying issues, a therapist can develop a treatment plan that helps people regain a sense of control over their social lives.
The classic symptom of ADHD, inattention, can also be a sign of depression. If you experience this symptom, you might seem withdrawn, detached, and disconnected from others. Life with both depression and ADHD can also result in social withdrawal.
Avoidance: Dismissing thoughts or feelings that are uncomfortable or keeping away from people, places, or situations associated with uncomfortable thoughts or feelings.
“The fear of intimacy can be caused by different reasons including abuse or neglect, medical problems, fear of abandonment, or religious beliefs. Sometimes, it can even be a combination of issues and securing the help of a professional is necessary.”
Similar to a guy who is scared of commitment, he might feel that it's getting a little too intense for his liking. Sometimes, guys act distant even when they like you. Sure, he loves you, but he also might be feeling that the emotions between you and the way you spend so much time together are a little too much.
What does it mean to stonewall someone? In simple terms, stonewalling is when someone completely shuts down in a conversation or is refusing to communicate with another person.
Symptoms of depression include a low sense of self-worth and a reduced interest in socializing and other activities, including sex. These may affect how a person feels about being in a relationship. If dissatisfaction with the relationship is a factor, the person may wish to leave.