The answer often lies in boredom and opportunity. If a man is bored in his marriage or believes something is lacking sexually or emotionally, he may start looking for reasons to leave a relationship for someone new. Sometimes men run away when they fall in love, looking to rekindle the spark of singleness.
According to marriage counsellor Clinton Power from Clinton Power + Associates, feeling under-appreciated, marital problems being buried, betrayal and growing apart are all reasons why men choose to walk away from an their partner.
He avoids resolving conflicts with his partner
One of the clear signs a guy is unhappy in his relationship is when he avoids further conflicts because it would make him more unhappy. Hence, whenever he conflicts with his partner, he prefers to keep to himself because he doesn't want to inflict more pain on himself.
After marriage, men work more, spend less time with friends, and are expected to take care of others. Men have an inner view that after marriage — but not before — their partners have the right to tell them what to do. And this could be one of the overwhelming reasons why men don't want to get married.
“Research tells us that on average, around 20% of men are unfaithful to their spouse, as compared to 13% of women,” says Leo.
Infidelity. Somewhere between a fifth and nearly half of all marriages end in divorce because of infidelity. When a man's spouse has been having other partners within the bond of marriage, the commitment and trust a man has left to offer can be strenuously pressured.
Key Pointers. Feeling emotionally distant or losing control over the relationship may push a man to leave his wife for another woman. Some men may even have unsatisfied physical needs and feel bored of their wives.
Fear. The threat of physical violence, further emotional abuse, harming your children by depriving them of a nuclear family, and concern about how friends and family will perceive them are commonly-cited reasons why people may choose to stay in an unhappy marriage.
It is possible, however, to have a committed and loving relationship without marriage, and some people who are uncomfortable with marriage ultimately change their minds. A disagreement about marriage doesn't have to end your relationship, particularly if you both are committed to the relationship.
He is no longer affectionate with you, physically or verbally. He no longer makes sweet or romantic gestures toward you. He doesn't say "I love you" anymore. He still says "I love you," but something about it feels hollow or forced, like he's just going through the motions.
According to relationship therapist Aimee Hartstein, LCSW, as it turns out, the first year really is the hardest—even if you've already lived together. In fact, it often doesn't matter if you've been together for multiple years, the start of married life is still tricky.
Studies show that depression in married people can also come from stress in the relationship itself, often referred to as marital stress. Poor communication, a lack of support, shame over things like a change in employment status and other triggers can all be associated with depression in marriage.
In the context of a marriage, the feelings of neglect, being left out, and not being heard are collectively referred to as emotional abandonment. It occurs when one partner is so preoccupied with their own concerns that they are unable to notice the struggles, concerns, or problems their partner is experiencing.
There are times you MUST leave—if there is ongoing abuse or if you are in danger of physical harm, you should only consider staying safe. Repeated bouts of addiction, cheating, emotional badgering, and severe financial abuse need to be handled with extreme care as well.
In a study done by Pennsylvania State University, the top reasons men listed for divorce was incompatibility, infidelity, lack of communication and personality problems. There are times where life chews you up and spits you out.
“If your partner doesn't want to get married and you do, you should not necessarily leave,” says Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin, a counselor and co-founder of the The Marriage Restoration Project. “Sometimes one partner feels pressured and is reluctant to commit.” But time can change this, Slatkin says.
Ideally, yes. But many couples are staying together for other reasons, such as kids. Their relationship evolves from a romantic one to a parenting one.
What does it mean to stonewall someone? In simple terms, stonewalling is when someone completely shuts down in a conversation or is refusing to communicate with another person.
The study found that on average unhappily married adults who divorced were no happier than unhappily married adults who stayed married when rated on any of 12 separate measures of psychological well-being. Divorce did not typically reduce symptoms of depression, raise self-esteem, or increase a sense of mastery.
Partners in unhappy relationships tend to stay together because they hope things can return to how they used to be, or they try to change each other through criticism and critique, says Sabrina Romanoff, PsyD, a clinical psychologist and professor at Yeshiva University.
And what we know is that men rarely leave their wives for the woman with whom they are cheating. The most recent statistics show that only 3 to 5% of married men who have affairs go on to divorce their wife and marry their mistress, and the current divorce rate for second marriages is thought to be around 60%.
Of the 254 divorced women surveyed, only 27% said they regretted their divorce. However, as for men, 39% of the 206 ex-husbands report they regret leaving their wives.
This occurs when a husband or a wife who is unhappy with the state of their marriage petitions for divorce without previous discussion or attempts to work on their relationship with their partner.
A study led by the American Sociological Association determined that nearly 70% of divorces are initiated by women. And the percentage of college-educated American women who initiated divorce is even higher.