INFJs feel a lot of responsibility for their relationships and will often put other people's needs ahead of their own. They tend to do this for a long time and then suddenly out of the blue “go dark.” They withdraw from people – even the people they love – until they can re-enter a state of emotional equilibrium.
If you did something wrong, INFJs got hurt and don't want you around anymore, that's how they will act. They can act cold in general too, like if they're going through something and it's not about you, they might still act cold. It's their way of accepting things, healing and dealing with their emotions.
We constantly do a lot of self-reflection, it's how we process a lot of things especially our emotions. When an INFJ feels sad, we generally will isolate ourselves (like staying in their rooms) or take a walk. Just doing something to stimulate our thinking.
INFJs' sensitivity means they have a deep appreciation for beauty and the arts. They can be moved to tears by music, art, theatre, books, films, food or flowers.
Kindness. As sensitive personalities, INFJs feel attracted to people who show kindness towards others.
They might get angry and defensive, scared of ever letting another person in. It's okay to feel those things, but it's not healthy to stay there long-term. The heartbreak doesn't have to define the rest of your life and your other relationships (I'm currently working on convincing myself of this).
In addition to being highly sensitive (sometimes to an extreme degree), many INFJs also struggle with high amounts of anxiety and depression. A lot of INFJs report that they experience a low-key depression running in the background of their lives, even when it appears that everything is going well on the surface.
When INFJs get angry, they're likely to process their feelings through Introverted Thinking before expressing them out loud. For example, imagine that you're an INFJ and you're angry because someone slacked off on a commitment and now you're running late on a deadline for work.
INFJs are, in many ways, an emotional sponge. Wired to think about feelings, relationships, and what's best for people, we tend to absorb the emotions of others even in the best of times. Unsurprisingly, that can leave us pretty exhausted — and that's true even if the feelings we're picking up are mostly positive ones.
Some may listen to really loud music, partake in risky physical behaviors, or they may become obsessed with cleaning, organizing, or exercising. INFJs grip-stress experiences will vary from person to person, what one person might do the other may not be interested in.
In my experience as an MBTI® practitioner, one of the most common struggles I hear from INFJs is the struggle of being misunderstood. INFJs feel misunderstood in their external environment and even by themselves.
Being cold and “heartless” is just an INFJ's surface personality, it's usually not real. They feel things very deeply, are sensitive and let things get to them easily. However, at times, INFJs can be really cold. If you did something wrong, INFJs got hurt and don't want you around anymore, that's how they will act.
It's important for INFJs to understand that they can have compassion toward themselves while also acknowledging their own struggles. INFJs should make a conscious effort to view and treat themselves in the same way they view and treat their loved ones when they experience pain — with compassion and understanding.
INFJs love when you help them out with something they may not be able to do for themselves, such as take care of them when they are sick or help them with housework (especially something they loathe).
Yes, the INFJ could be withdrawing from you because they realize they aren't really interested in you in that way. They may want to remain friends, but they're afraid to say those words out loud, in case they lose a relationship with you completely.
Due to our intuitive and feeling traits, INFJs feel deeply, and that's likely the understatement of the year. But because of our complete willingness to put others first — combined with our need to have complete trust in someone before opening up — we may fail to communicate our emotions.
INFP is the type most commonly mistaken for INFJ, and they use Ne as their co-pilot process. If Signs 1 and 5 are both sound true for you there's a very good chance you're an INFP. ENFPs lead with Ne and have Fi as their co-pilot.
While many individuals feel that their personality type is distinct, the INFP and INFJ personality types are commonly confused, as the qualities of these personalities appear quite similar at first glance.
Despite the fact that INFJs are complex individuals who are highly empathic and intuitive, they do commonly struggle with trust issues. These trust issues may be rooted in their private nature, their idealism, their empathy, or past experiences of hurt or betrayal.
INFJ: Superficiality
Superficial conversations about gossipy topics or small talk don't usually interest an INFJ, so it can be a major turn-off when someone is too eager to stick to the surface level of communication. Shallow conversations and frivolous topics can make an INFJ feel bored, disconnected, and uninspired.
The short answer: INFJ (Introverted-Intuitive-Feeling-Judgment) is the most complex Myers-Briggs Personality Type. Let's examine INFJs and why this personality type is so complicated.
The best matches for INFJs include intuitive types such as INTJ, INFP, and ENFJ. INFJs are the least compatible with sensors, especially ESTJs, ESTPs, and ESFPs. INFJ-INFJ relationships can be emotionally fulfilling yet difficult if both INFJs aren't willing to openly discuss relationship problems.