It may not always be possible to forget unwanted memories, but people can use strategies to help them cope with traumatic events. This can include memory suppression techniques, identifying triggers, and contacting a mental health specialist. Learn more about post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and coping strategies.
If You Can't Let Go of Past Mistakes, You Must Watch This
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Why can't I let my past mistakes go?
People who struggle to let go of specific events from the past may have experienced trauma. Trauma is a kind of psychological wound that can result from any distressing experience, such as loss, danger, or deep embarrassment. Often, people associate trauma with being involved in a violent event, such as war.
A difficulty with letting go of the past will likely be related to one or more of the following key emotions: guilt, regret or sadness/anger. Guilt is an emotion that tells us we have violated some rule or norm. For example, “I should have done this” or “Why did I do that”.
Even if you're not aware of it, thinking persistently about the past may be something you do to find relief from things that are out of your control. You may ruminate on the past once and again trying to uncover new perspectives on what happened, or revising every detail as if you could change it.
Bringing Up The Past In Arguments Does More Harm Than Good
Many people feel that referencing the past, and their hurt will give them a better result in the present disagreement. But, bringing up the past can quickly cause an escalating argument. Trying to recall the past accurately is prone to errors.
Our personal memories give us a sense of continuity — the same person (or sense of self) moving through time. They provide important details of who we are and who we would like to be. Memories offer us potential solutions to current problems and help guide and direct us when solving them.
Cognitive-behavioral therapies seek to eliminate traumatic memories, but these approaches are vulnerable to relapse. New advances in the neurobiology of fear memory promise novel approaches to PTSD treatment, including the erasure of traumatic memories.
However, research shows that humans often remember negative or traumatic experiences over positive ones. This persistent recall of negative memories might be an evolutionary defense mechanism, but it can also lead to psychological impediments, like depression or anxiety.
Your mistakes don't define who you are. It's what you do after you have made the mistakes that makes all the difference. Every mistake you make is a learning experience. They don't make you less capable. But it's how you correct them or learn from them that defines you.
What does it mean to stonewall someone? In simple terms, stonewalling is when someone completely shuts down in a conversation or is refusing to communicate with another person.
Don't regret your past decisions because they led you to where you are today, no matter where that might be. Everything in life has its purpose. No matter how much pain its caused you or how terrible a situation it might have been, there is a grand design that we don't realize.
To begin the process of overcoming your inner-critic it is important to realize that your anxiety does not spring from your actions but rather a negative way of thinking. In other words, the painful memory of a past mistake is what actually produces anxiety.
