A dysfunctional family is a family in which conflict, misbehavior, and often child neglect or abuse and sometimes even all of the above on the part of individual parents occur continuously and regularly, leading other members to accommodate such actions.
Dysfunctional families often cause the emotional delegation of responsibilities to fall to certain family members. This can occur in households that have a member suffering from addiction or a codependent relationship.
Factors that can impair a family's functioning include poor parenting, distressed or abusive environments, substance abuse, mental illness, chronic physical illness, and poor communication.
A dysfunctional family is unstable and witnesses frequent fights. Usually, parents in such families neglect or abuse their children, making their lives difficult. There could be various reasons behind such behavior of a family member. It could be alcoholism, drug addiction, mental illness, or abusive behavior.
There are six common roles individuals typically assume, often without even realizing it. In general, children take on these roles when dealing with an addicted loved one, but adults may adopt them as well.
Toxic family dynamics refer to unhealthy family relationships characterized by harmful behaviors, poor interactions, and ineffective conflict management. Unhealthy family dynamics include signs such as: Lack of boundaries and empathy. Lack of personal space and privacy. Constant conflicts, hostility, and aggression.
Victimized children growing up in a dysfunctional family are innocent and have absolutely no control over their toxic life environment; they grew up with multiple emotional scarring caused by repeated trauma and pain from their parents' actions, words, and attitudes.
The six most commonly agreed upon roles are called Hero, Scapegoat, Lost Child, Mascot, Caretaker/Enabler and Golden Child. The roles can shift over the family's lifespan. One child can also take on more than one role, depending on what the family environment demands of them.
Dysfunctional families are fertile ground for neglect, abuse, secrecy, addiction, or denial. In these family systems, children's emotional needs go unmet because the parents' needs take precedence. One or both parents might be suffering from a substance use disorder, personality disorder, or mood disorder.
The “lost child” is the family member who retreats from family dysfunction due to feeling overwhelmed. They can spend a lot of time alone, pursue singular interests, and/or struggle to establish or maintain relationships with others.
SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP
Try going to family or individual counseling. A professional therapist can help you identify dysfunctional family patterns you might not yet see and help you to create tools to set boundaries and lift yourself out of the situation at hand.
Children in dysfunctional families often experience some form of childhood trauma physical or emotional abuse, neglect, abandonment, witnessing violence, homelessness, etc. Below is a list of experiences that are common among children in dysfunctional families. You may relate to some or all of them.
What is a toxic parent? A toxic parent, says Dr. Childs, is a parent that puts their needs before their child. “They're more self-centered than other-centered,” she adds. Coupling these with other traits can give you a good idea of whether or not your parent or parents are toxic.
The Caretaker/Peacemaker/Mediator
They are the one who takes on the duties and responsibilities of others in the family. They will be continually attempting to save other family members from the consequences of their words and actions.
The Scapegoat
The Scapegoat is the opposite of the Hero role, and is seen as the problem of the family. The Scapegoat is also referred to as the “black sheep” of the family, and has a hard time fitting in and relating to the other family members. His/her behavior is seen as bad and never good enough.
And the most important person in a family are the parents. The most important thing about children is the need to prepare them properly for responsible citizenship.
In conclusion, the functional family refers to the family depicted by openness, with perfectly defined and yet flexible boundaries. The dysfunctional family constitutes the family in denial, not recognizing the existence of any problematic situation and/or they can create problems where they do not exist.
Do you describe your upbringing as dysfunctional? You're not alone. In fact, according to recent statistics, 70%-80% of Americans consider their families dysfunctional.
It is often the result of a parent or caregiver not getting the emotional support they need. As a result, they are unable or don't know how to provide their children with emotional support.