Even the slightest touch or movement can create immense suffering.” Breakups are hard enough, but for those who identify with symptoms of BPD and have no “emotional skin”, losing the love and companionship of their favorite person can leave them feeling such unbearable pain that life itself is too much to bear.
Unfortunately, because people with BPD have an insecure sense of self, fragments in the relationship feel extremely threatening. If their favorite person disappoints them, it can feel devastating. They may react with rage, threats, or complete withdrawal.
Unfortunately, one of the nine classic symptoms of BPD is having unstable interpersonal relationships, so it's common for people with BPD to either cut off contact with their loved ones or have people walk out of their lives. This dynamic can make losing a favorite person incredibly painful.
An “FP” (or Favorite Person) is a person who someone with mental illness relies on for support, and often looks up to or idolizes. Common with borderline personality disorder (BPD), it's often that someone has a minimum of one FP, but a person can have many.
Borderline Personality Disorder
However, because of the nature of this condition, the favorite person connection may sometimes swing between extreme love and attachment, to a strong dislike. This switch may occur when the person with BPD perceives that their emotional needs aren't being adequately met.
Results found in a 2014 study found the average length of a BPD relationship between those who either married or living together as partners was 7.3 years. However, there are cases where couples can stay together for 20+ years.
Recovery in borderline personality disorder (BPD) has predominantly been viewed in the context of symptom improvement and no longer meeting diagnostic criteria. Longitudinal studies have demonstrated that symptom remission is a common occurrence, with remission rates ranging between 33 and 99% [1].
Losing your favorite person feels like losing everything. In the moment it feels like nothing else matters. It feels like you can't breathe.
Individuals with BPD often fill an emotional void in their partner's life. With their charm and undivided attention, you may have felt exceedingly happy when the relationship was going well. With the source of fulfillment gone, you may feel empty, which can make it more difficult to move on.
Along with high emotions - the borderline partner's fear of abandonment may be triggered and they may try harder to hold onto the relationship - or possibly they won't be able to cope and will seek retribution.
Approach them very gently when they are in a stable mood. Don't specifically mention BPD if you can help it—just tell them their behavior is worrisome to you because you love them and want them to be happy. Offer your support every step of the way.
Grief may be especially difficult to process for people with borderline personality disorder (BPD) due to strong overwhelming emotions. It is important to remember that grief is complex and that everyone will have unique experiences of grief.
Research has shown that the prognosis for BPD is actually not as bad at once thought. Almost half of people who are diagnosed with BPD will not meet the criteria for a diagnosis just two years later. Ten years later, 88% of people who were once diagnosed with BPD no longer meet the criteria for a diagnosis.
Follow up studies of people with BPD receiving treatment found a borderline personality disorder treatment success rate of about 50% over a 10-year period. BPD takes time to improve, but treatment does work.
Splitting is a psychological mechanism which allows the person to tolerate difficult and overwhelming emotions by seeing someone as either good or bad, idealised or devalued. This makes it easier to manage the emotions that they are feeling, which on the surface seem to be contradictory.
Those diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) or those with BPD who may not even know they have it, are more likely than the general population to be verbally, emotionally/psychologically, physically abusive.
Sometimes BPD exes come back because they miss you. Other times, they return because they've worked hard to improve themselves. Either way, if you've discarded your ex and blocked him/her, don't worry! The person you rejected will eventually stop reaching out to you.
BPD features are highly represented in subjects with psychopathy as well as psychopathic traits are highly prevalent in patients with BPD.
Borderline personality disorder usually begins by early adulthood. The condition seems to be worse in young adulthood and may gradually get better with age. If you have borderline personality disorder, don't get discouraged.
These results suggest that patients with BPD report becoming more accepting and forgiving over time. Additionally, recovery status is significantly associated with increasing time in these states.
BPD splitting destroys relationships by causing the person to distort how they see themselves and others. BPD relationships shift between highs and lows. BPD splitting destroy relationships in the way that the person defends against bad feelings within themselves so that they can feel good about themselves.
Their wild mood swings, angry outbursts, chronic abandonment fears, and impulsive and irrational behaviors can leave loved ones feeling helpless, abused, and off balance. Partners and family members of people with BPD often describe the relationship as an emotional roller coaster with no end in sight.
Do borderlines regret the loss of a quality partner? No, they often regret the decision to let that partner go. People who suffer from a borderline personality disorder (BPD) often have intense and unstable relationships. They may idealize their partners one minute and then devalue them the next.