Jesus said, "But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you." (Luke 6:27-28 NIV) In the following verses Jesus gives several specific examples of how to treat those who have hurt you, and He concludes with, "Be merciful, just as ...
If we keep our guard up, we mistakenly believe it will keep us from getting hurt again. God says leave retribution to Him. Romans 12:19 reads: “Do not take revenge…but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: 'It is mine to avenge; I will repay,' says the Lord” (NIV).
The Lord says, “'It is mine to avenge; I will repay'” (Romans 12:19 NIV). He wants us to trust Him to set things right and even the score. When we surrender our anger, we may still feel hurt, but that hurt won't express itself in active or passive retaliation.
In fact, the Scriptures are full of teachings instructing us to leave relationships with wicked or evil people, to be separate from them, to shun, outcast, and purge them from our midst. (1 Corinthians 15:33, Proverbs 13:20, Psalm 1:1, Proverbs 6:27, 1 Corinthians 5:11, 1 Corinthians 10:13 – these are just a few).
John 15:13 tells us, “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” This friend is Jesus, and He laid down His life for toxic people—and that includes me.
Treat them with respect. Stay as calm as possible. Speak with them privately about the issue, for starters. Bring in others if needed (Matthew 18:15-18).
Jesus also demonstrates the need to sometimes “verbally” walk away when dealing with a toxic person, like Herod. Instead of arguing with Herod and trying to justify himself, Jesus remained silent: “[Herod] plied him with many questions, but Jesus gave him no answer” (Luke 23:9).
Here is what the Scripture says: God is just. He will punish through everlasting destruction and those who are so punished will be shut out from the presence of the Lord, forever. This will happen when Jesus Christ is revealed. This is one of the hardest truths in the Bible.
Psalm 147:3
The Bible says the Lord is close to the brokenhearted and heals the brokenhearted. So, not only will God provide comfort as you move on from a past relationship, but He'll actually help you do it. God will help you heal from the wounds caused by the relationship and move forward in life and love.
If the person knows we are being hurt and doesn't care, the best is to forgive (to not feel pressured or guilty if we do care about this person), but also to keep distance in order to avoid future problems. Also, we must make sure we are communicating our concern in a clear and honest way.
“Dear Lord, search my heart. Reveal to me any remaining burs of hurt where I have attempted to forgive apart from You. I pray You would cover these hurts in Your healing grace, and through Your strength, empower me to forgive others as wholly and completely as You first forgave me. In Jesus' Name, Amen.”
That's how many times the Bible tells us we should forgive someone. Matthew 18: 21-22 21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” 22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
Narcissism is addressed in the Bible in Paul's second pastoral epistle to Timothy (2 Timothy 3:1-7) in the fall of A.D.67. Paul seems to be concerned about the character and behavior of leaders within the church, so he warns Timothy to beware of those who act out of a “self love attitude”.
Often narcissism is not mentioned in Christian theology, sermons, or Bible Studies because term is not explicitly found in the Bible. Yet, the concept of narcissism and the dangers it poses to the human community is fundamental to scripture.
Ephesians 4:2-3
We need to be humble, gentle, patient, and exhibit love toward one another (Corinthians 13). By cultivating these virtues, we can overcome any kind of relationship problem, even marital ones. There must be a desire to understand your partner.
When Paul says, “husbands love your wives as Christ loved the Church” (Ephesians 5:25), he is categorically prohibiting every attitude or behaviour that results in a husband devaluing, humiliating, belittling, or emotionally or physically wounding his wife.
It can be related to childhood traumas or variations of abuse at any age. When pain is all you know, it can be challenging to seek alternative behaviors. There's also the instances in which we are blinded by love. It's easy to get caught up in a relationship, even when it's toxic.
Repeatedly, God warns children to honor their parents with loving hearts of obedience (Exodus 20:12, Ephesians 6:2). Mouthy and sarcastic children who demean or belittle their parents' leadership and decision making are clearly on a path to destruction. King David's son, Absalom, is one such example in the Bible.
Likewise, don't hold people's sins against them forever if they repent and seek to change by God's grace. But if someone has not had time to change and they recently did hurtful things to other people, God wants you to protect your own heart (Proverbs 4:23) by avoiding this person.
If a friendship is detracting from your walk with God rather than adding to it, it's time to end that friendship. As Jesus said in Matthew 5:30, “And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away.