The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 5:8 that “to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord.” It is a testimony to our family and friends that we believe our deceased loved ones are not in the casket. You shouldn't feel wrong about not wanting to attend the funeral, especially if you have a legitimate conflict.
For this is what the LORD says: "Do not enter a house where there is a funeral meal; do not go to mourn or show sympathy, because I have withdrawn my blessing, my love and my pity from this people," declares the LORD.
Ecclesiastes 7:2-3 New International Version (NIV)
It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, for death is the destiny of everyone; the living should take this to heart. Frustration is better than laughter, because a sad face is good for the heart.
I am not familiar every religion on earth, there may be one that does consider it a sin. But mainstream religions in the US do not require attendance at a funeral. There may be social or familial issues that arise from non-attendance, but it does not constitute a sin.
So a Christian funeral has more to do with celebrating what has happened to the spirit. A Christian funeral should not be focused solely on the body of the person who died. The focus is on what we are proclaiming, that like Lazarus, we have only fallen asleep and we are waiting to be awakened (John 11).
The overall purpose of a Christian funeral is to help the deceased's soul enter into Heaven, while offering comfort and support for mourners.
Christian funeral services focus on the journey of the departed to find eternal peace in heaven. The final rites prepare the soul for salvation and everlasting peace, acting as a rite of passage.
Provided you have given it some thought and haven't overlooked any important factor about skipping a funeral, then most people will be respectful of your wishes to not attend. But you can expect some pushback from friends and family who don't agree with your decision.
Skipping the funeral can delay the grieving process, making it take longer to heal from your loss. Family and friends of the deceased need to connect with each other, and if you do not attend the service, you will likely run into many people who want to express their condolences and talk about the loss.
During this difficult time, many people choose to let calls go to voicemail as they handle the practical and emotional demands. If you choose to call to tell someone you can't attend the funeral, follow up with flowers and a sympathy message if you can. Also, be prepared to leave a message.
According to most Biblical study websites, there is no explicit scriptural command for or against cremation. There are no passages that forbid cremation, according to most Biblical scholars. However, some passages describe standard death practices during these times.
These denominations state that there is nothing in the Bible to condemn cremation, therefore the decision between burial and cremation can be left to personal choice. Although cremation is permitted in Christianity, burial is more traditional.
1 Thessalonians 4:13-14
"But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters, about those who have died, so that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have died."
Revelation 21:4 “And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.” Romans 8:18 “Yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory he will reveal to us later.”
'He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death' or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.
Though you may find it uncomfortable to say something to the family of the deceased at a funeral, it is always appropriate to extend your sympathy for the family's loss. All you need to do is offer a few sympathetic and kind words in an even tone or even share a fond memory of the person if you wish.
It is perfectly okay to request no funeral after your death or to not arrange a funeral for a loved one who did not want one. Although some people may be upset by the lack of a traditional funeral, the wishes of the deceased should be followed when at all possible.
And that's perfectly normal. There are many different ways to grieve, and not all of them involve crying. Just because you don't cry doesn't mean you're not grieving or that you don't care about the person who died. Some people simply don't tend to express their emotions through tears.
Don't feel guilty about saying or doing something that causes a loved one to cry or crying yourself. Crying is healthy. If, however, you find yourself weeping uncontrollably (you're causing a scene or making other mourners uncomfortable), it is polite to excuse yourself until you regain control.
Are Funerals Mandatory? Funerals are not required by law, but when someone dies, their body must be buried or cremated. The family doesn't have to hold a funeral or memorial service if they would not like to.
The first actual mention of cremation in the Bible is 1 Samuel 31: 11-13 where Saul and his sons are burned and then their bones buried after terrible ravages were inflicted on their bodies. But this was probably done for sanitary reasons rather than religious ones.
Ultimately, attending a funeral not only pays tribute to the person who died, but acts as a powerful means of support for the loved ones left behind.
The Purpose of a Funeral Service
Funerals allow us to say goodbye. Funerals offer continuity and hope for the living. Funerals provide a support system for us, friends, family members and the community. Funerals allow us to reflect on the meaning of life and death.