Oversharing is saying something personal or inappropriate in the wrong setting or to the wrong person. It's usually not something people with ADHD do on purpose. Sometimes they may not realize they're giving too much information or saying the wrong thing.
Examples of Oversharing
Posting intimate details about your relationships, friendships, family matters, or personal drama. Using social media as a soapbox or a way to vent your emotions. Posting photos or videos of things meant to be private. Posting embarrassing photos or videos of yourself or others.
If you share your mistakes in an effort to help others learn, you are being authentic. If, however, you share your hardships to gain pity, you're oversharing. An attempt to fast-track the relationship. Authentic people build relationships first.
Oversharing doesn't create intimacy. Oversharing is self-absorption masked as vulnerability. This may also signal emotional neediness and/or lack of boundaries.
Oversharing can all too often be a smokescreen for a serious psychological issue, including things like anxiety disorder and borderline personality disorder. And the first hint can be whether you can control your blather or not.
Those who struggle with social anxiety are typically more prone to oversharing. When you feel anxious around other people, it can easily lead to rambling. You might also start oversharing because of low self-confidence or the need to please people.
It's common for people with ADHD to overshare information. People may be impulsive and not stop to think about what they're saying. Treating ADHD can help people improve self-control and think about consequences.
Being careless with your privacy can open you and your family up to everything, from cyberbullying and theft to extortion and kidnap. Criminals can use social media geo-tagging, landmarks and research into your typical behaviour or schedule.
If your partner makes you angry, miserable, or bored often and if it is very hard for you to explain the reasons why you still love this person, it's an obvious sign that you should go your own path. If you feel suffocated in a relationship and if the negatives overshadow the positives, it's time to move on.
In the case of manipulation, oversharing may mean that you lack strong boundaries, which could put you in the way of manipulation (Lusinski 2020).
Don't: Share secrets – yours, the company's or other people's. Any time you share information, make sure it doesn't put anyone else at risk. A good rule of thumb is to never share anything about another person – even your mom – unless you have permission.
Oversharing is a common struggle among people who lack personal boundaries. It's not a conscious decision, but it often leaves us feeling icky and depleted. Oversharing usually comes from a desire to connect.
The Oversharing Habit Is a Way for Us to Cope
Oversharing is one of those coping mechanisms that falls in that gray area, sometimes helping us to release stress, communicate our internal struggles or joys with others, and to reach out in a time of need.
Oversharing is about poor boundaries. It's a misplaced request for emotional labour or support that is inappropriate for the wider situation or the relationship with another person. It comes from a purely selfish place.
Oversharing is described as “revealing an inappropriate amount of detail about one's personal life” – and Dr Kirren Schnack, a clinical psychologist from Oxford, has taken to TikTok to address the potential causes behind it.
1. To bring valuable and entertaining content to others. We want to inform, amuse, and help the people in our lives, and that's why 94% of people say they share on social media, according to The New York Times.
If you live with complex trauma or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), trauma dumping or oversharing could be a natural trauma response and coping mechanism.
Vulnerability is a quality that brings people closer together and leaves them feeling more connected. Oversharing does the opposite. It's an uncomfortable and unsatisfying experience for both parties.
People with BPD often engage in self-sabotaging behavior. This can include: Oversharing.
People with ADHD have a hard time with conversation. They might get distracted and lose track of what the other person is saying. They might ramble, and monopolize the conversation, said psychotherapist Terry Matlen, ACSW. They might interrupt.
2. Oversharing and disclosure. A first date with a narcissist can be deceptively speedy when it comes to intimacy. You'll find that there are some narcissists who, on first dates, will disclose a great deal of personal information about themselves or ask you for personal information.
Oversharing. It can be hard to process and filter the constant thoughts, heightened feelings, and energy levels of a manic episode. This can sometimes result in feeling unable to stop oneself from sharing random or inappropriate compulsive thoughts, even in serious situations.