Clues to spot flirting are body language, such as smiling, leaning forward, and touching, and verbal cues such as compliments or references to being available. You can also ask yourself if the person's behavior is consistent over time and whether they act differently with you than they do with others.
Deliberately Touching Someone
Yet, frequently and purposely touching someone in a provocative way–like caressing their hand or giving them a tight and lingering hug–is inappropriate flirting, and implies a romantic/sexual interest, particularly when there's attraction between either party.
Examples from the Collins Corpus
She says her good looks and flirtatious behaviour charmed the police waiting at the hospital. Although the relationship was flirtatious it was platonic. I giggled, thinking he was ringing for a bit of flirtatious banter to cheer himself up.
Some flirting signals are obvious, like touching, and other flirting signs, like eye contact or compliments, are more subtle. Actions that you think might just be friendly gestures can actually indicate romantic interest.
Unlike playful flirts, “sincere” flirts strive for emotional connection and enjoy getting to know their crushes. They ask questions and pay close attention during conversation. This flirting style is the most common, perhaps because it's usually the most effective, the research showed.
Harmless Flirting
This can mean buying a drink in a social setting, freely giving compliments, side arm hugs or other non-sexual touches, a platonic friendship. The term “harmless” is only applicable if you are willing to disclose this behavior (without shame or concern) to your partner.
“We all know someone who is friendly, easily talks to anyone, and has a way of leaving an interaction with the other person feeling extra good about themselves — this is an example of innocent flirtation,” Kotlarski indicates.
If Your Conversations Feel Deep & Personal, They Might Be Flirting. Barrett says you should also pay attention to the nature of your conversations. “Friendliness is more surface-level, but a flirter wants to go deeper and get more personal, finding out about your life, your feelings, your past," he explains.
A flirty smile uses your eyes, your head, your neck and even your whole body. There are different flirty smiles, small little smirk, one side of your lip raising just a bit, the closed mouth raised eyebrow, or even biting your bottom lip gently.
While physical touch can be your language of expression, it might not necessarily be the other person's. Be careful how you present yourself around someone new. Leaning in while conversing, holding eye contact, and even crossing your arm while talking to someone can be deciphered as flirty body language.
Eye contact (flirting triangle: eye-eye-mouth; eye-eye-mouth) Genuine smile (wrinkles in corner of eyes) Standing tall; unhurried walk, easy strides. Sitting positions.
Touching becomes flirting when it's done in a playful or affectionate manner. This could include a light touch on the arm during a joke, a playful nudge during a game, or a gentle touch on the hand while sharing a moment. The key here is that the touch is not aggressive or intrusive, but gentle and affectionate.
Research identifies five main styles of flirting: physical, sincere, playful, traditional, and polite. The physical style is associated with expressing interest through physical behavior. The sincere style is associated with attempts to create an emotional bond.
Playful flirting involves teasing and bantering with the other person in a lighthearted and fun way. It may involve making jokes or puns, using sarcasm, or engaging in witty banter. Playful flirting can help to create a relaxed and enjoyable atmosphere and can be a good way to break the ice.
There are two types of flirting, healthy flirting and flirting with intent. Healthy flirting is fun, frivolous, entertaining and makes everyone laugh and feel good. It makes people feel focussed on, important, attractive and in general it has a strong positive and playful vibe to it.
Platonic flirting is flirting with a platonic friend, with no intention of romance, and no desire for sex. You might find yourself giving your platonic friend compliments, touching their arm, or giggling with them. This can be natural and harmless, as long as both parties feel comfortable.
Teasing is one of the biggest ways that a man can flirt with you. If he makes fun of you lightly for your clothes, for how you walk, how you laugh, or for any of the other things about you that he actually just thinks are really adorable, then he's definitely flirting with you.
Another clear sign he likes you is if he is actively trying to hang out with you, or help you, or find out more about you. There are also indicators like eye contact or compliments, and showing that he's interested in your physical appearance, or who you are as a person.
Here are the typical signs someone is attracted to you:
They tilt their head as you speak (a sign of engagement). They smile at you. They make eye contact with you. They reach out and touch your arm, hand, back, or leg.
“If someone secretly likes you, they may tilt their head as you speak, which is a sign of engagement,” Dr. Hafeez shares. They'll turn to you when you speak and will keep their body language open. “Their legs will be crossed in your direction and their arms won't be folded with 'closed' body language,” she adds.