Insecure people feel a constant need to validate their worth through others' opinions. They try to seek others' approval over their personality or work. They look for likes, comments and compliments from people and only feel happy when others acknowledge them.
“Some of the most common insecurities and relationships include emotional insecurity, attachment insecurity, physical insecurity, financial insecurity, professional insecurity, and social insecurity,” explains LaTonya P.
“Talking too much, or not talking at all, is a telltale sign of insecurity,” says Wood. “Insecure people are self-focused rather than connection-focused, so they don't pick on normal conversational cues.
Fidgeting — Crossing and uncrossing one's legs, tugging at one's clothing, adjusting our position or posture or other movements made in a restless or repetitious manner tend to send the message that we are nervous or feeling insecure about our surroundings.
They are overly concerned about what others think of them. They never express a firm opinion. They suffer from a chronic inability to make decisions, even when the choices have little consequence. They frequently try to change the direction of projects and meetings.
These extreme body image disturbances include body dysmorphic disorder, eating disorders and severe depression. Body Dysmorphic Disorder: This is a disorder of “imagined ugliness.” What individuals with this disorder see in the mirror is a grossly distorted view of what they actually look like.
Insecure people often use criticism of others as a way to feel better about themselves. See, people who are insecure consistently feel bad about themselves. And often, they don't know how to feel better in a healthy or productive way. So they often resort to criticizing others.
Toxic people are often insecure people. They tend to make themselves feel or seem better than others by talking badly about them rather than taking concrete actions to develop their skills. Toxic people feel entitled to judge others, their actions, decisions, and lifestyles.
Why do those people who suffer from being insecure, additionally, are usually angry? People who are insecure experience a lot of fear of being abandoned or disliked because they are unsure of themselves. There has been a trigger for anger. This behavior is usually a way to protect themselves.
The kind of childhood you had, past traumas, recent experiences of failure or rejection, loneliness, social anxiety, negative beliefs about yourself, perfectionism, or having a critical parent or partner can all contribute to insecurity.
The main reason people lie is low self-esteem. They want to impress, please, and tell someone what they think they want to hear. For example, insecure teenagers often lie to gain social acceptance. Here, parents should emphasize to their children the consequences of lying.
Insecurity may stem from a traumatic event, crisis such as divorce or bankruptcy, or a loss. It can also result from one's environment, as unpredictability or upset in daily life can cause anxiety and insecurity about ordinary, routine events.
Narcissists are insecure because they have a deep-seated need for validation and attention from others. They often try to overcompensate for this insecurity by seeking power and control over others… and constantly seeking confirmation of their own self-importance.
Insecurity and anxiety can lead to controlling behavior. Instead of using healthy coping skills, controlling people want to control the world around them in an attempt to feel better. Often, controlling behavior is the result of a mental condition that causes a person to have abnormal social expectations.
Signs of Insecurity in Relationships
Feeling jealous of all the other people in their life and resenting the other people they are close to. Not taking your partner at their word and wanting to verify everything they tell you. Feeling like your partner may break up with you at any time.
Face/ Skin
One of the biggest insecurities people can develop throughout their lives is how one's face looks; acne, oily skin, moles, freckles or even scars are marks that can lead people to think they're unattractive and therefore feel insecure.
Body dysmorphic disorder is a mental health condition in which you can't stop thinking about one or more perceived defects or flaws in your appearance — a flaw that appears minor or can't be seen by others. But you may feel so embarrassed, ashamed and anxious that you may avoid many social situations.
The fear of being socially judged is one of the most common forms of insecurity. Some people feel self-conscious, anxious, and fearful when in front of others. It doesn't matter whether it's a group of colleagues or family members. This can extend to even the smallest of social encounters like a date.