A family scapegoat is a person who takes on the role of 'black sheep' or 'problem child' in their family and gets shamed, blamed, and criticized for things that go wrong within the family unit, even when these things are entirely outside of their control.
They are more likely to believe that they are exaggerating, are being too sensitive, or can't trust their judgement. Self-sabotage or self-harm: Scapegoats tend to internalize the harmful messages they've received about themselves from birth or early childhood onward.
Signs you're the scapegoat of your family:
You feel you have to act out or defend yourself in rebellion (e.g., feeling hurt and angry, or the need to fight or lash out in some way). You look for the truth in your family's dynamics, and they don't want to hear it (e.g., "How dare you question my parenting").
As a consequence of having their family relational distress and abuse symptoms go unrecognized, many adult survivors of FSA suffer from anxiety, panic attacks, depression, unrecognized grief, and anger management issues.
Scapegoats often have trouble feeling safe in relationships – especially intimate relationships – due to the massive betrayal of trust in their family. They can also have challenges managing emotions, and find they either feel overwhelmed and anxious, or shut down and not know how they are feeling.
As adults, scapegoated children may find themselves paralyzed with fear when they consider dissenting in work environments or with their partners. Disagreeing with someone brings oneself into the forefront. The act delineates the self in stark relief.
They do this by seeing themselves as the healer and fixer of you. It is at this point that the scapegoat becomes the identified patient in the social group. They use the idea of themselves as a good person for focusing on helping and fixing you to further avoid their own pain.
People are more likely to engage in scapegoating when they are stressed, experiencing oppression, or afraid. Scapegoating, in turn, can lead to the oppression of a scapegoated group.
Scapegoating is a practice commonly employed by people who display traits of narcissism, often taking the form of bullying. In cases like these, the person may be even more aggressive about the behavior in an attempt to make the other person feel small or powerless.
Key points. Dysfunctional families, communities or societies will have people who are scapegoated. The purpose of the scapegoat is to place blame and shame somewhere, allowing others to avoid accountability, equality and inclusivity. The scapegoat is established as a threat or inferior and thus validating mistreatment.
The phrase 'Scapegoat' is used to indicate that someone is being made to take the blame for something. Example of Use: “They made Jennifer the scapegoat, but it wasn't all her fault.”
When a scapegoat leaves their family of origin they are going to experience a lot of invalidation, devaluation, dehumanization, and chaos that is designed to manipulate them back into the abuse cycle and remain a repository for the family's negative emotions.
In adulthood, some scapegoats become narcissists themselves as a defence against being victimized again. Others learn ways of compensating for their low self esteem and lack of trust in others by becoming highly successful in order to gain recognition from others outside the family.
The Scapegoat
The Scapegoat is the opposite of the Hero role, and is seen as the problem of the family. The Scapegoat is also referred to as the “black sheep” of the family, and has a hard time fitting in and relating to the other family members. His/her behavior is seen as bad and never good enough.
The “plebs” might resent them, but a scapegoat is a victim that can be safely attacked.
For Girard, scapegoats are always innocent of the specific charges laid against them; the accusations are always false; scapegoating is always a heinous act of injustice.
The Golden Child is trained to not support the Scapegoat, and to treat as less than, to neglect and to be unaware of their needs, just like the narcissist.
Like the strong goat Aaron selected, the target of family scapegoating is also often the strongest and healthiest member of the family.
When they grow up, scapegoated children may experience the following: Difficulty expressing their needs: From a young age, the scapegoat child learned to hold things inside. Anything they said could and would often be used against them.
with the least power.
Scapegoat theory in psychology
A scapegoat is a person or group you place blame on. When scapegoating children, the child is blamed or shamed for all the issues that arise within dysfunctional households. Here's how scapegoating works: The parent with NPD blames their child (or children) for family issues.
1. an analysis of violence and aggression in which individuals undergoing negative experiences (such as failure or abuse by others) are assumed to blame an innocent individual or group for causing the experience.
According to the American Psychological Association, scapegoating is “the process of directing one's anger, frustration, and aggression onto others and targeting them as the source of one's problems and misfortunes.” The word's origin is an ancient Jewish tradition in which a goat was symbolically sent into the ...