A dysfunctional family is characterized by “conflict, misbehavior, or abuse” [1]. Relationships between family members are tense and can be filled with neglect, yelling, and screaming. You might feel forced to happily accept negative treatment. There's no open space to express your thoughts and feelings freely.
The five types are the authoritarian family, the passive-aggressive family, the enmeshed family, the disengaged family and the substance abusing family. Understanding these five types of dysfunctional families can help you identify unhealthy patterns in your own relationships and work towards creating healthier ones.
Factors that can impair a family's functioning include poor parenting, distressed or abusive environments, substance abuse, mental illness, chronic physical illness, and poor communication.
Toxic family dynamics refer to unhealthy family relationships characterized by harmful behaviors, poor interactions, and ineffective conflict management. Unhealthy family dynamics include signs such as: Lack of boundaries and empathy. Lack of personal space and privacy. Constant conflicts, hostility, and aggression.
The Golden Child is greatly valued by their narcissistic parent for a variety of reasons–these form a heavy load for the child to carry. Within the dysfunctional family, the golden child learns early on that their role is to please their parent and live out their parent's own unfulfilled ambitions.
Victimized children growing up in a dysfunctional family are innocent and have absolutely no control over their toxic life environment; they grew up with multiple emotional scarring caused by repeated trauma and pain from their parents' actions, words, and attitudes.
Some signs of a toxic family include manipulation, criticism, controlling behavior, dismissive behavior, a sense of competition, unreasonable punishment, and unpredictability.
What is a toxic parent? A toxic parent, says Dr. Childs, is a parent that puts their needs before their child. “They're more self-centered than other-centered,” she adds. Coupling these with other traits can give you a good idea of whether or not your parent or parents are toxic.
The majority of toxic families have an undiagnosed mental health condition, and they do not want to admit they need help. Instead, they blame everyone else for their issues and often think that the world is against them.
Dysfunctional families are primarily a result of two adults, one typically overtly abusive and the other codependent, and may also be affected by substance abuse or other forms of addiction, or sometimes by an untreated mental illness.
Children in dysfunctional families often experience some form of childhood trauma physical or emotional abuse, neglect, abandonment, witnessing violence, homelessness, etc. Below is a list of experiences that are common among children in dysfunctional families. You may relate to some or all of them.
Feelings of extreme anxiety, low self-esteem, worthlessness, difficulty trusting others, maintaining close relationships, or feeling worn out after a visit with your family are all signs you grew up in a toxic family.
The Scapegoat
The Scapegoat is the opposite of the Hero role, and is seen as the problem of the family. The Scapegoat is also referred to as the “black sheep” of the family, and has a hard time fitting in and relating to the other family members. His/her behavior is seen as bad and never good enough.
Criticism, looking down on you, bullying, invalidating or gaslighting, and physical intimidation or abuse – all of it happens in toxic sibling relationships. You may be so accustomed to how your sibling has been treating you all of your life that you take it as a given.
The four survival roles Cruse mentions include the hero child, the scapegoat, lost child, and mascot or clown. The hero child can be any age but carries certain characteristics and feel compelled to rescue the other misguided members of the family.
Black sheep, hero, and enabler are some of the most commonly known roles, each working together to continue the dysfunctional cycle. While most people can immediately identify what role they might take, some roles change over time or may be difficult to identify.
The “lost child” is the family member who retreats from family dysfunction due to feeling overwhelmed. They can spend a lot of time alone, pursue singular interests, and/or struggle to establish or maintain relationships with others.
What are the traits of a glass child? Experts say a glass child is typically emotionally neglected; experience severe pressure to be problem-free and perfect; take on parental responsibilities within the family at a young age; and have an overwhelming need to make others happy.
Growing up in a dysfunctional family unit could result in frequent job loss, poor boundaries in relationships, and difficulty launching into adulthood. A study into the physiological trauma of children of dysfunctional families found that these types of units are usually distinguished by unharmonious parenting styles.