Telling if someone is lying is hard, but look for inconsistencies: verbal cues like vagueness, repeating phrases, or giving too many/few details; body language shifts such as fidgeting, grooming, or covering the mouth; and mismatches between words and actions (e.g., saying "yes" while shaking their head). The best approach is to establish a truthful baseline for someone's normal behavior, then watch for deviations from that pattern, focusing on clusters of signs rather than one single cue, as no single sign guarantees a lie.
Keep an eye out for the following signs, and you won't be taken advantage of by a liar.
17 Signs Your Partner Is Probably Lying
Instead of saying, “I didn't do it,” a deceptive person might shift the focus with a protest statement like “Why would I do something like that?” or “You know me, I would never.” Others might repeat a question verbatim, buying themselves time while crafting a response.
The effort required to lie varies among people; however, evidence suggests that liars are more likely than truth tellers to exhibit certain behaviors—hesitating, making errors, speaking slower, pausing more, and waiting longer before answering.
Even meticulous liars can be thrown by the unexpected, so the ability to give original, convincing, non-scripted responses comes in handy. Delays and verbal fillers signal deception, so good liars are quick-witted, thinking fast on their feet.
“Among other common lies, we have the silent lie — The deception which one conveys by simply keeping still and concealing the truth. Many obstinate truth-mongers indulge in this dissipation, imagining that if they speak no lie, they lie not at all.” —Mark Twain (1835-1910)
Liars fear being caught, leading to consequences like punishment, rejection, or humiliation, but also fear the exposure of their true, often flawed, selves or the shame and guilt associated with deception, especially when lying stems from trauma or low self-worth. They fear losing control, the damage to trust when lies are revealed, and situations where someone remembers details, as inconsistencies unravel their fabrications.
When a pathological liar is caught, they won't admit they were lying and will likely become defensive. Pathological liars may try to deflect the blame, find excuses for their lying, minimize the importance of the lie, or admit only to a small part of their dishonesty.
Watch for inappropriate, unusual, or uncommon behavior.
They might say “no” while nodding “yes.” They could exhibit strange emotions (laughing when the subject is serious, for example). Or, they may say they feel one emotion while looking like they feel another.
Here are a few techniques to determine if someone is telling the truth or not.
Stage 1. Children begin to lie around age two or three. These first lies often focus on just denying misbehavior. They may involve wishful thinking more than deliberate efforts to deceive.
10 Strategies for Detecting and Responding to Lying
There are many signs someone could be lying. For example, one may make too little or too much eye contact, sweat or flush in their face, fidget or enact unusual gestures, have trouble maintaining normal speech patterns, and have difficulty controlling the volume and tone of their voice.
How a pathological liar behaves when they are caught in a lie depends on the individual and the circumstances. For example, some people may react angrily or become defensive, while others might try to rationalize their lies or make excuses for them.
Study results did not support the hypotheses that upper right gaze indicates lying. Nor that looking up and to the left indicates truthfulness.
How can you tell if someone is an untrustworthy person?
However, there are a few potential red flags that might indicate that someone is lying, including:
Instead of saying “I didn't do it,” they'll say “I did not do it.” Or they'll say “I cannot remember” instead of “I can't remember.” They're basically overselling their lie by trying to sound more powerful and less refutable. But formal language is unnecessary (and sounds unnatural) if you're telling the truth.
The research above concluded that the most common motivations for lying are:
Silence is analysed in seven concealed modalities: the unthinkable, the unspeakable/unsayable, the ineffable, the inarticulable, the unnoticeable, the unknowable, and the unconceptualizable.
The eyes: Someone who is lying might stare or look away at a crucial moment, says Glass — a possible sign they're moving their eyes around as they try to think about what to say next. The research conducted by Geiselman at UCLA corroborated this, finding that people sometimes look away briefly when lying.
What to Know About Lying