What's a Vilomah? Vilomah is a word gaining acceptance to describe a parent who has lost a child. Expectation from the natural life-cycle is that a child will out-live the parent. There are times when this is not the case and the child passes away before the parent.
A parent whose child has died is a vilomah.
Vilomah is a Sanskrit word that means against a natural order. It took years of pondering, research, and discovery for the word vilomah to come into the forefront. It's used to describe a person whose child has died. It's a complicated concept wrapped up in a small but powerful word.
Vilomah means “against the natural order of things.” It comes from Sanskrit, the same language that gave us the word widow which means “empty.” I have lived, “against the natural order of things,” for almost 11 years now.
To every courageous loss mama, with an aching heart and empty arms, I leave you with this: Yes, you are a still a mother, and you always, always will be. The love you two share is forever, just as your motherhood is forever.
She's one who holds it together in the big things and falls apart over spilled milk. Who loves deeply those closest to her, but keeps her heart guarded for protection from others. She's one who grimaces at the first laughs after loss but later laughs louder than most.
A grieving mother is a bereaved parent who may have experienced some kind of loss. There is no strict definition of what constitutes this loss. For example, a mother may have gone through any of the following: Miscarriage. Stillbirth.
Specifically, parents who experienced the death of a child would be more likely than would nonbereaved parents to report depressive symptoms, poor psychological well-being, health problems, limited social participation, marital disruption, and limited occupational success.
Plant a small tree in your own yard, on school grounds or through the public parks program; add a plaque. Adopt a highway segment (a sign with loved one's name or pick up litter). Establish a charity foundation or fundraiser in memory of your child. Make a charity donation in their memory.
Bible Verses About Grieving The Loss Of A Child
'He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death' or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” I have no one else like him, who will show genuine concern for your welfare.
The initial severe and intense grief you feel will not be continuous. Periods of intense grief often come and go over 18 months or longer. Over time, your grief may come in waves that are gradually less intense and less frequent. But you will likely always have some feelings of sadness and loss.
Coping strategies include finding support, expressing your feelings verbally or through creative outlets, and seeking professional help from a therapist. Losing a child is one of the most painful events a parent can experience. A therapist can help you deal with the pain, sadness, and anger.
The number one way to supporting a grieving person is to listen to their stories. They need to talk about the details of their trauma because the loss they've experienced is massive and talking through such loss is often how one begins to make sense of it. They will also need to talk about their loved one.
My sincerest condolences for you at this time. You have my deepest sympathy and unwavering support. Wishing you peace, comfort, courage, and lots of love at this time of sorrow. My heart goes out to you at this difficult time.
"Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are ever before me.
Proverbs 13:22: “A good man leaves an inheritance to his children's children.” (NKJV) This verse keeps our life goals, our vision and our legacy front and center when we're choosing how to use our money today.
Grief, especially from losing a child, is not something you get over. Grief ebbs and flows and changes with time. Some days will be very hard and others will be a little easier. Eventually, grief should feel muted and in the background but most likely will be present in one way or another throughout life.
“Sending you strength and peace.”
Accepting that your child has been gone for an entire year can feel devastating. Strength and peace may be just what a grieving family most needs to keep going.
Under normal circumstances, the child's surviving biological parent is usually awarded custody of the child after the custodial parent's death. The most common exception to this is if the surviving parent is ruled to be unfit to be the child's guardian.