A common sign of people with narcissism is the belief that they are superior to others and deserve special treatment. They believe that others should be obedient to their wishes and that the rules don't apply to them. Another common trait of narcissism is manipulative or controlling behavior.
Yes, narcissists are very controlling. In fact, the clinical definition of narcissism lists controlling as one of the ways narcissists gain control over others. Narcissists are driven by self-obsession. They care only about their own needs, image, desires, goals, and experiences.
The answer is likely no, and this is just a tactic used by the narcissist to get the attention off of them and onto someone else, such as you. So, what are some reasons why the narcissist would accuse you of being the problem? One reason is that the narcissist truly believes they are superior and can do no wrong.
A narcissist's dependence on the consistent flow of narcissistic supply is the reason why they often are so controlling. They don't want you to focus on your own thoughts, feelings, emotions, and needs.
They may not trust anyone else to handle things the way they will. Controlling behaviors can also be a symptom of several personality disorders, such as histrionic p ersonality, borderline personality, and narcissistic personality. These disorders can only be diagnosed by a licensed health care professional.
They will often deploy a variety of narcissistic relationship patterns such as manipulation, charismatic, and exploitational tactics in order to ensure that their own needs and wants are met. As a spouse, you may be the subject of their manipulation and abuse, while your partner treats everyone else positively.
They'll often go on a smear campaign.
Narcissists are happy to spread rumors and lies—even if they know the stories aren't true. When they realize they can't control you anymore, they'll may decide to punish you by ruining your reputation or turning people against you.
Victims constantly ask if the narcissist knows what they are doing? The answer is “yes”, they are consciously aware that they are manipulating, they may even take pride in doing it.
They Will Discard You
It is common for a narcissist to discard you once they realize that they no longer can control you. Discarding is a manipulation tactic that occurs when a narcissist abruptly ends the relationship that they have with you.
Grandiose sense of self-importance
Grandiosity is the defining characteristic of narcissism. More than just arrogance or vanity, grandiosity is an unrealistic sense of superiority. Narcissists believe they are unique or “special” and can only be understood by other special people.
Final Thoughts on the Red Flags of a Narcissist
Narcissistic individuals often exhibit traits such as a lack of empathy, manipulative behavior, and an inflated sense of self-importance. It's essential to understand that dealing with a narcissist can be draining and challenging.
To Maintain Control
Because of this, a narcissist will revert to any manipulation tactics they think will give them the most control over people and their situation. If you react most to the silent treatment, they will continue to use this tactic to get the reaction they want from you.
Yes, a narcissist is aware of his or her behavior, but unaware of the psychological mechanisms that compel and justify the behavior.
They can know they're hurting your feelings, but as long as it elevates their status, they may not care. Someone living with narcissism does cry. They can feel regret, remorse, and sadness. These emotions, however, don't often have roots in empathy.
People with narcissistic personality disorder tend not to perceive that they themselves may have a mental health problem, and thus may be less likely to seek evaluation or treatment.
Narcissists tend to be incapable of something called "object constancy," which means they struggle to have positive feelings at the same time as negative ones. Once they are fired up for a fight, they can be incredibly cruel, because all they can comprehend in the moment are feelings of resentment and anger.
Not all narcissists are cheaters, but rates of infidelity are higher among them, which may concern people who are in a relationship with a narcissist.
Narcissists can love, but this superficial and momentary affection serves as a way to get what they want from others. While their role as caring partners, parents, or friends may appear genuine, a lack of empathy and devotion to themselves renders narcissists unable to develop meaningful relationships.