And while there's definitely some of this anger element in jealousy, it's my experience that when you really reflect on it, jealousy is more closely related to sadness and fear—that is, it tends to be a response to a perceived or threatened loss or inadequacy (more on this later).
However, both jealousy and envy can cause feelings of insecurity. Envy is more likely to cause feelings of sadness and a desire to change. Meanwhile, jealousy is more likely to provoke anger and resentment.
It can involve feelings of envy, insecurity, resentment, and suspicion. But while it is a natural instinctive emotion, jealousy can have a powerful effect on your mental health. Feelings of jealousy and envy can often cause anxiety, poor self-esteem, and emotional self-sabotage.
Jealousy generally refers to the thoughts or feelings of insecurity, fear, and concern over a relative lack of possessions or safety. Jealousy can consist of one or more emotions such as anger, resentment, inadequacy, helplessness or disgust.
Jealousy is the emotion we feel when we feel fearful of losing someone or a relationship that is very important to us, Robin Stern, PhD, associate director for the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, tells NBC News BETTER.
Research has identified many root causes of extreme jealousy, including low self-esteem, high neuroticism, and feeling possessive of others, particularly romantic partners. Fear of abandonment is also a key motivator.
If you're the target of jealousy, you may feel like someone (usually a partner or friend) is trying to control your life. They might do things such as check up on you, try to tell you what to do (or not do) and how to act, or limit your contact with friends and coworkers.
Your Heart.
According to Jonathan Dvash, neuroscientist at the University of Haifa, the sympathetic nervous system buckles under the stress of jealousy, quickening the heart and spiking blood pressure. Left unchecked over time, this could lead to hypertension and heart disease.
Research shows that jealousy is often fueled by insecurity, not love for a partner.
Past trauma
If you've experienced emotional abuse or betrayal from past relationships, that can start to taint your view of future relationships if the trauma goes unchecked. This is where jealousy can rear its head and feed into those feelings, by making you feel anxious or afraid of losing the person you're with now.
Too much of anything can be unhealthy, but a little jealousy is not bad or unhealthy from time to time. Jealousy is a normal human emotion, and like all our emotions, they're here to tell us something about ourselves and what we need. Emotions need to be released.
The bottom line here is that it's completely natural to feel jealous — it's what you do with those feelings that matter. Accepting jealousy as another part of the everyday emotional spectrum, rather than glamorizing it or trying to ignore it, is the key to using it for good.
“It takes a lot of courage and vulnerability to admit that you're jealous,” Dr. Skyler says. But it's important to do so—especially if you're feeling it regularly because jealousy can be a sign that trust has been broken in some way, and you're not feeling safe.
Someone in the grip of jealousy will suffer raised blood pressure, heart-rate and adrenalin levels, weakened immunity, anxiety and probably insomnia." While these intense feelings may emotionally exhaust you, they can also keep you up at night.
Some of the various signs of jealousy might be accusations, suspicions, questioning your behavior or day-to-day activities, having negativity towards partner's relationships, comparing themselves to others, and more.
It can, in extreme cases, lead to mental health conditions like anxiety or depression. It's also a symptom of mental health conditions and commonly occurs in the presence of bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, and other personality disorders.
Extreme Jealously
When jealousy creeps into a romantic relationship, it can often fester into controlling tactics to assert dominance. “Do not ignore this red flag because it could also lead to an abusive and controlling situation,” says Kelman.
Jealousy is said to be one of two types: reactive jealousy, which occurs at the awareness of an actual threat to the relationship, or suspicious jealousy, which can occur without any indications that the relationship is being threatened (Bringle & Buunk, 1991).
“Jealousy is the highest form of flattery.”
Individual Psychological Factors
Past experience can increase a person's likelihood of being jealous. An adult whose parents modeled jealousy may tend more toward jealousy, and a person who has been betrayed by a lover might be more prone to suspicion. Traits such as anxiety can also affect jealousy.