But loving someone with anxiety can be hard too. You might feel powerless to help or overwhelmed by how your partner's feelings affect your daily life. If so, you're not alone: Multiple studies have shown that anxiety disorders may contribute to marital dissatisfaction.
The spouse or partner may become the sole breadwinner at times — often a stressful role and one the partner may not wish to have. Social life — People with anxiety disorders often avoid routine social activities. Unfortunately, the partner's social life can suffer as well, making both feel isolated.
It can be hard to relate to these concerns, and as a result, many people don't know how to best help someone with anxiety. “People are often dismissive of people experiencing anxiety,” says Joseph McGuire, Ph. D., a pediatric psychologist with Johns Hopkins Medicine.
While it can be difficult at times to navigate a relationship with someone who has anxiety, putting in the effort to do so has many rewards. In fact, learning how to understand and more effectively communicate with someone with anxiety can deepen your bond, and make for a more fulfilling and more intimate relationship.
Anxiety and Romantic Relationships
Mental health disorders such as anxiety can interfere with a relationship if the individual is not aware of their signs and symptoms or if they allow their mental health disorder to go untreated.
Dating someone with anxiety can feel very overwhelming and stressful, especially once your partner's behavior shifts. They may start to shut down, pull away, and behave in a passive-aggressive manner, or they may become more controlling, angry, or overly critical.
Some people with relationship anxiety go even further than looking for reasons to break up, and actually sabotage the relationship. This stems from a fear that “things won't work out anyway.” If this is the case, reflect on what is motivating you to do so.
Many people find that having an untreated anxiety disorder can affect their romantic life. People with a social anxiety disorder may constantly worry about how they are being judged by others, so they may avoid romantic relationships or dating in general due to the fear of embarrassment.
Individuals suffering from an anxiety disorder excessively avoid and fear perceived threats in the environment (such as social occasions or unfamiliar places) or from their own mind (such as unusual physical feelings).
Learn More About Anxiety
Untreated anxiety disorders can negatively impact a person's whole life. It can inhibit their ability to work or study, cause social relationships with friends and others to become strained, and eventually lead to a life of isolation.
Symptoms of relationship anxiety may include self-silencing and excessive reassurance-seeking. People with relationship anxiety may also crave acceptance from their partner and fear rejection. These symptoms can negatively impact the relationship over time.
A marriage complicated by anxiety creates a stressful environment for both spouses. The anxious half may suffer from limiting feelings and inability to face the daily demands of life, while the non-anxious spouse assumes more than the normal share of domestic, parenting, financial, and other responsibilities.
If you feel like you're playing a part, behaving and responding based on how you think you should rather than authentically, you might want to reassess what's going on. If you're not able to be authentically yourself around your partner, flaws and bad moods and all, it might not be the right relationship for you.
Some ways to manage anxiety disorders include learning about anxiety, mindfulness, relaxation techniques, correct breathing techniques, dietary adjustments, exercise, learning to be assertive, building self-esteem, cognitive therapy, exposure therapy, structured problem solving, medication and support groups.
To show your partner you accept their anxiety, you need to encourage them to open up about it. Try to listen without judging, becoming defensive or taking their anxiety personally. Provide reassurance and have empathy towards the situation.
Anxiety disorders are the most common of mental disorders and affect nearly 30% of adults at some point in their lives. But anxiety disorders are treatable and a number of effective treatments are available. Treatment helps most people lead normal productive lives.
Encourage your partner in the positive steps they are taking, and acknowledge their strengths. Don't avoid talking about their anxiety. Invite them to share, and show them that you accept them unconditionally, even as you commit to working on the challenges together.