"Wanting your partner to change their lifestyle is very legitimate if it's based on a concern for your partner's physical and emotional well being," he continued. "No one wants to watch the person they love self destruct or fall into self-defeating patterns.
Telling you to lose weight doesn't have to be an automatic deal breaker, but it can certainly be a red flag, depending on the intent. For example, if you're actually experiencing health complications due to your weight, your partner could just be looking out for your well-being.
Not only is it counterproductive to point out that someone should lose some weight, it's harmful to her health as well. A study in the journal Obesity says people who feel stigmatized because they carry too many pounds suffer a form of stress that can increase health risks. It's a two-part problem, experts say.
When one partner loses weight and the other doesn't, it can lead to serious relationship problems. A recent study by North Carolina State University found that when one partner lost 30 or more pounds, that had a negative impact on the relationship, causing arguments about food, as well as nagging and resentment.
Walking is often an easy and effective way to lose weight, especially for beginners, as well as a great way to bond. You can also come up with leisurely activities that focus on fun but also promote physical activity indirectly. Help research weight loss programs that might be suitable for your overweight spouse.
Tell her you want to lose weight and you need her help.
You might say, “I feel like I've been gaining weight over the past few months and I want to make some changes. I don't know if I have the willpower to do it alone, though. Do you want to start working out with me? I could really use the support.”
Co-morbidities related to obesity, like diabetes, often take the spotlight but weight issues have deleterious effects on relationships as well. Couples can become couch potatoes, watching TV instead of being on the go. Working out may take a backseat now that one is no longer on the prowl for a mate.
In fact, 81% of couples were still married 5 years after surgery. But where the U.S. population has a divorce rate of 3.5%, bariatric patients in the study had an 8% divorce rate.
You can compliment someone's outfit or hairstyle, for example, but telling someone “You look great, have you lost weight?” ultimately translates to, “You look good because you're smaller and thinner.” We start to internalize the idea that other people are monitoring our bodies, which perpetuates societal pressure to be ...
This is especially important when talking to people with eating disorders or serious body image issues, since such remarks can worsen their situation. Compliments about someone's weight loss or thinner body perpetuate society's deep-seated diet culture, Tran said, and the idea that thinness is inherently good.
If you're concerned about their body, be careful.
But experts told INSIDER it's best to wait until they say something rather than giving your two cents. Just because someone gains weight or is at a size you deem to be "unhealthy" doesn't mean they actually are.
Weight does affect who will date us. Weight does affect how much our partners want to have sex with us. Stick with the lower calorie foods when eating out with our romantic partners. It's attractive that you take good care of yourself.
Research shows that many happy couples tend to gain weight, beginning in the early stages of a relationship and lasting into commitment. But it's not inevitable; you can take steps to avoid relationship weight gain.
Even more might not approach a fat woman, but are completely content and happy with their partner even when she gains weight throughout their relationship. For many men, attraction is not married to a dress size, and love is possible regardless of the number on the scale.