This is an anguishing state that tends to prolong over time, to the point where it can interfere with other aspects of a person's daily life. It's not uncommon for their mood to change. Also, it's not uncommon for them to stop trusting others, have sudden attitude changes, and mistreat others. Resentment is like rust.
Resentment can appear in many different forms. Some signs you may be harboring resentment include: Continual or recurring feelings of a strong emotion, such as anger, when thinking about a specific interaction or experience. Inability to stop thinking about the event that triggered the strong emotions.
Common sources of resentment include publicly humiliating incidents such as accepting negative treatment without voicing any protest; feeling like an object of regular discrimination or prejudice; envy/jealousy; feeling used or taken advantage of by others; and having achievements go unrecognized, while others succeed ...
: having or showing a feeling of anger or displeasure about someone or something unfair. She is resentful about being demoted. He's resentful of his boss. = He feels resentful toward his boss. a resentful child.
Strong, Uncomfortable Feelings
The feeling of resentment can be very distressing. Other uncomfortable feelings such as jealousy or ill will toward others may come along with it and linger. You may develop feelings of regret for the things you did or said or the way your life turned out.
The byproducts of resentment are numerous: desire for revenge, punishment, frustration, alienation, outrage, fury, wrath, hostility, ferocity, bitterness, hate, loathing, scorn, spite, vengefulness, and dislike. That's not an insignificant list.
An imbalanced liver and gallbladder can be caused by longstanding feelings of repressed anger, such as resentment, frustration, and irritability.
A person experiencing resentment will often feel a complex variety of emotions that include anger, disappointment, bitterness, and hard feelings. Resentment is commonly triggered by: Relationships with people who insist on being right all the time. Being taken advantage of by another. Feeling put down.
One thing you can know for sure is that if you don't try to address the resentment, it won't go away by itself. Resentment is a cancer that metastasizes and eventually makes it impossible for a healthy relationship to survive.
Resentment is closely related to, but not the same as, anger. Resentments can be viewed as negative feelings toward someone or something that stems from the past. Resentment is often the re-experiencing of past wrongs- real or perceived- and the old feelings of anger connected to them.
The difference between resentment and hate is that resentment is usually tied to a specific circumstance. You hate somebody in general, but you resent them for a particular event.
Consider taking an empathetic approach. Embrace the conversation with the person who hurt you — as hard as that may be. While you might feel like the victim in this scenario, it's very possible that they're the victim of a past trauma that triggered the act over which you're feeling resentful.
Resentment is the feeling that you did not get your way in the past. These feelings are therefore based on selfishness (the need to get your wants fulfilled).
Resentment has the toxic potential to unwind your relationship because it blocks partners from moving toward each other to repair deep hurts. Many couples who come into counseling find they waited too long.
Holding onto a grudge can significantly impact your mental and physical health. “When we hold onto grudges and resentment, it's like drinking poison and expecting the other person to get sick,” says Angela Buttimer, MS, NCC, RYT, LPC, a licensed psychotherapist at Thomas F. Chapman Family Cancer Wellness at Piedmont.
Practice cognitive behavioral techniques to stop indulging in resentment. Put a thought between your feelings of resentment and indulging in ruminating about them. Acknowledge your part in allowing the abuse to occur, forgive yourself for that, and make a decision to not let it occur again.
If resentment is left unchecked, the couple feels as if they are drifting apart and no longer identify each other as the primary person in their life. While everyone experiences emotions slightly differently, certain feelings and behaviors geared toward a partner may be signs of resentment in a marriage.
Jealousy seems akin to envy in involving resentment and attribution of responsibility. However, resentment and attribution of responsibility have much greater odds of being rational when present in jealousy than in envy. We often think of jealousy as intimately tied to romantic love.
Bitterness and resentment relate to anger. When we let anger at others or frustration at our situation fester and build up in our hearts, we can begin to develop bitterness and resentment. Often bitterness takes root when we are hurt by others or we think a situation we are put in is unjust or unfair.
It often occurs in couples when one or both the partners feel hurt or offended by the other and think that their actions were deliberate. The first step to solving any problem is the recognition of the problem. Resentment in a marriage has several red flags, which you can identify if you look for them.
Emotions of anger and resentment are often held in our jaw and around the mouth. If you often have a sore throat, mouth ulcers or grind your teeth at night, it could be a sign that there is an excess of overactive or stagnant energy in this part of your body.
Resentment is a self-eroding emotional state, potentially leading to depression and physical symptoms, such as rashes and headaches. The function of resentment is not to make people feel powerless but to attract attention to a relationship in trouble in order to improve it.
Chronic anger puts you into a fight-or-flight mode, which results in numerous changes in heart rate, blood pressure and immune response. Those changes, then, increase the risk of depression, heart disease and diabetes, among other conditions.