Loving a concept rather a person means you can easily imagine replacing your partner for someone else. According to licensed clinical psychotherapist Dr. LeslieBeth Wish, the main thing that separates real, authentic love from loving the idea of someone is how attached you feel to your current partner.
When you are falling in love with someone, you stay consistent in your efforts with them. One of the signs that it is more than a crush is when you start being consistent in making plans with them, talking to them, or just being around them.
You probably like someone for more than just their attention if you think of them all the time, even when they aren't around. If you ask them to do things on the weekend and initiate conversations because you are thinking about them, you're likely having strong feelings about them.
If they seem uninterested in talking things out in a mature way, they just may be with you because they love the idea of being in a relationship. "They may only be in it for the label and perks, without wanting to create real connection," she says.
What does it mean, then, to like the idea of someone but not really like them? Put simply, it means you may be drawn to what a stable, loving relationship provides, or to a certain vision of who this person is in your mind, but not the actual person that you are currently in a relationship with.
Confusion about love is incredibly common, whether you're heartsick over a potential partner or just unsure about how to express your feelings. If you're experiencing uncertainty when it comes to love and romance, one of the most effective solutions is to try to reflect on your own feelings, wants, and desires.
Signs you just like the attention
If you're only talking to them for attention, Wood says you might notice the following red flags: You feel anxious without their time or attention. You're emotionally unavailable, and you keep your guard up. You don't know much about them beyond the surface (and you don't care to).
When you are truly like someone, you really look forward to any connection you may have. You constantly check your phone for texts, calls, emails, etc. Just thinking about your next conversation makes you smile ear to ear. If you are dating them just to kill time you might be too lazy to reply to their messages.
This first stage of the relationship may be referred to as the “honeymoon phase,” “puppy love,” or “infatuation.” In the first stage of a relationship, partners may try to impress each other and could feel open-minded and excited by someone else reciprocating attraction.
According to licensed clinical psychotherapist Dr. LeslieBeth Wish, the main thing that separates real, authentic love from loving the idea of someone is how attached you feel to your current partner. "You might start 'looking around' for a new person in your mind," she explained.
Infatuation is often a fantasy-based, passionate longing for someone else. It can prevent you from acknowledging their weaknesses, and may even land you in an unhealthy situation. Love is often based in reality and is fed on closeness and knowledge of the other person.
Someone who is super interested in you will want to talk to you all the time. If you and your crush have lengthy conversations often, or even just send a few short texts throughout the day, it's likely that they have strong feelings for you. This could also be a sign that your crush thinks of you as a very good friend.
For starters, Brown says it's super important that you've spent enough time with them to really get a feel for who they are: “The time to tell them is after you've spent enough time with them to get a true sense of who they are and if you sense that the two of you are compatible in the most important ways that you ...
The three stages include lust, attraction and attachment. The first phase of falling in love is the lust or the desire phase.
People gravitate towards you
Aside from captivating the attention of strangers, you might notice that a lot of people easily warm up to you and try to get closer to you when you first get to know them. This could be because they find you attractive and admire the way you carry yourself.
Reciprocal liking, also known as reciprocity of attraction, is the act of a person feeling an attraction to someone only upon learning or becoming aware of that person's attraction to themselves. Reciprocal liking has a significant impact on human attraction and the formation of relationships.
Why People Emotionally Shut Down. Trauma, prolonged stress, anxiety, depression and grief all contribute to feeling emotionally shut down. Nemmers says medication, while lifesaving for many, can also trigger a side effect of emotional numbness.
Poor communication can erode the connection people have. Initial feelings of lust fade with time, which can make feelings of love seem less intense. People change over time, which may mean that people simply grow apart. Shifting priorities can mean that each person has separate, sometimes incompatible goals.
Why we feel instant attraction to some people, and not others, is affected by lots of different things: mood, hormones and neurotransmitters, how alike we are, the shortage of other partners available, looks, physical excitement, and the proximity of geographical closeness.