How long does it take to get over empty nest syndrome?
Similarly to anyone experiencing redundancy, the mother may feel worthless, disoriented and unsure of what meaning her future may hold. However, most mothers adapt in time. Psychologists suggest that it may take between 18 months and two years to make the successful transition from 'mum' to independent woman.
Wanting to cry when your children leave the nest is a normal reaction. Rather than deny your feelings or try to keep it bottled up, it's important to honor your feelings. Allow yourself to feel sad and grieve over the changes that are taking place.
In general, empty-nest syndrome is a process with three distinct stages: grief, relief, then joy, says social psychologist Carin Rubenstein, author of “Beyond the Mommy Years: How to Live Happily Ever After . . .
Sadness: Feeling down, hurting emotionally, and possibly crying more often. Grief: Experiencing a deep sense of loss, and a yearning for things to return to the way they used to be—missing the child who has left and the daily experiences involved in having the family together.
However, another study did both things using over 4 decades of data from the U.S. General Social Survey and found that empty nesters ages 50 to 70 were 5 to 6 percent more likely to report being very happy that parents with young children living at home.
What is the psychological impact of the empty nest?
The empty-nest syndrome is a psychological condition that affects both parents, who experience feelings of grief, loss, fear, inability, difficulty in adjusting roles, and change of parental relationships, when children leave the parental home.
Empty nest syndrome isn't a clinical diagnosis. Instead, it's a phenomenon where parents experience feelings of sadness and loss when the last child leaves home. It's common for parents to find letting go to be a painful experience — even though they encourage their children to be independent.
The time after becoming empty-nesters are psychologically happy as there is no stress and responsibility of a child to look after and parents can introspect.
Who is most likely to experience the empty nest syndrome?
Full-time parents (stay-at-home mothers or fathers) may be especially vulnerable to empty nest syndrome. Adults who are also dealing with other stressful life events such as the death of a spouse, moving away or retirement are also more likely to experience the syndrome.
Happiness is U-shaped – it declines and bottoms out in your 40s, so report countless studies, until it starts to inch its way up again in the 50s. This is a remarkably consistent finding, across countries and cultures.
The other parent may just feel lonely because the children aren't home. Concern about the children. It's natural to be concerned about your children's education, career, and social life. Too much anxiety and worry can prevent a parent from focusing on his/her spouse and can lead to empty nest syndrome and divorce.
Parents think of moving away from their children all the time, but in many cases, it's not in the best interests of their children. If you believe that moving far away is sincerely best for your family and you can afford to see your children regularly, then that's good.
People sometimes call it Disneyland Dad Syndrome. This refers to a time when Mom typically got full custody of the kids. Dad, on the other hand, just had weekends and vacations. Therefore, time with Dad was the “fun time.”
No matter if the hurt is physical or emotional, we feel our child's pain. This might be as simple as a bad day at school or it might be as significant as pain associated with dying. While all pain isn't equal, it is there for all parents.
