Patience and hope, unconditional love, and being there for the child are the best responses that alienated parents can provide their children—even in the face of the sad truth that this may not be enough to bring back the child.
Although there are no guarantees, many professionals believe and have seen many alienated children return. Some are helped to return by therapists, assisted by court orders, and others may need to be deprogrammed.
Reunification therapy is a specialized mental health treatment designed to repair a parent-child relationship due to parental alienation. Sometimes courts make referrals to therapists trained in this kind of therapy.
In most cases, parental alienation backfires, with the child struggling with feelings of loss and resentment towards both parents. Removing the other parent from their life causes the child to feel isolated and neglected, instilling feelings of insecurity.
To stop parental alienation, work to maintain a positive, loving relationship with the child so that the child feels safe with you. Consider speaking with the other parent about behaviors you've noticed. If the alienation continues, consider parenting classes, therapy, and going to the Court for help.
Gaslighting is especially common in cases involving parental alienation, but it can be used in plenty of other situations as well.
A child who has been alienated against a parent, feels guilt and shame for having been made to take part in acts of hatred against a loved parent, so much so that the feelings impact in a physical as well as emotional, mental and psychological way.
The effect of alienation is dramatic on children. Children become overwhelmed, anxious, depressed, and confused. These children often develop an unhealthy sense of entitlement that leads to social alienation and behavior problems.
Can the alienation of children be reversed? As children get older, the alienation can be reversed with proper psychological care. However, it won't work if the alienating parent is not contained.
Children exposed to parental alienating behaviours may develop a confused sense of self-perception and fail to remember how to trust their perceptions and feelings, resulting in an uncertain identity, lack of self-esteem, and deep insecurity [10,15].
Alienated children typically appear rude, ungrateful, spiteful, and cold toward the targeted parent, and they appear to be impervious to feelings of guilt about their harsh treatment. Gratitude for gifts, favors, or child support provided by the targeted parent is nonexistent.
There are several behaviors that are typical of alienated children, including demonizing the rejected parent, resisting or refusing to spend time or communicate with the alienated parent, idealizing the favored parent, and attempting to get third parties to believe that the alienated party is wholly bad.
Key points. Parental alienation is when one parent (usually the custodial parent) negatively influences the child's perception of the “target parent.” Target parents may experience both emotional (e.g., fear, guilt) and physical (e.g., nightmares, illness) responses to the alienation.
When you write to your alienated child, write from the mother or father within you and tell your child what you want them to hear about how they are still loved, still missed, still cared for and about how you are still there, still well and still waiting.
The rejection of a parent is associated with many long-term, negative consequences for the child. Depression, anxiety, poor self-esteem, lack of trust in relationships, and self-defeating behavior are just some of the deleterious consequences.
Often it is only a matter of time before alienating parents become desperate and their unstable mental health gets the better of them. People in an official position start to recognize the alienating parent as being out of line, and become supportive of the targeted parent.
Parental alienation does not protect a child's interests—it places them in peril. When a parent's behavior threatens not only your well-being, but also your child's, it is worth doing everything in your power to fight back. If your ex is engaging in such tactics, you should explore every legal option at your disposal.
Parental alienation syndrome is a psychological condition that a child suffers when one parent takes steps toward destroying the other parent's relationship with their child. The alienating parent manipulates the child's point of view about the other parent through deceptive tactics.
Narcissistic parental alienation syndrome occurs when a parent with narcissistic traits attempts to maliciously alienate their child from an otherwise loving parent. This is often accomplished by attacking the other parent's character in front of the child.