Not remembering trauma can be a coping mechanism, which is when the brain protects someone from experiencing the intense feelings associated with memory. So instead of a clear, detailed memory, someone may have gaps or only remember vague sensory aspects, like a color or smell.
The point of trauma-focused therapy is not to make people remember all the disturbing things that ever happened to them. People do not need to remember every detail in order to heal.
Experts say that repressed memories are never really forgotten. They stay hidden from our conscious awareness, but intrude upon our daily life in fragments, dreams, triggers, and flashbacks. "Often the memories do not come back as verbal narratives but as symptoms such as dissociative episodes.
As to whether or not memories are lost forever, Dr. Komaroff says that was once the thought based on what the medical community knows about Alzheimer's disease. The belief now is that memory loss is fitful and that your memories are not lost forever but in an area of the brain that is harder to access.
Trauma is not physically held in the muscles or bones — instead, the need to protect oneself from perceived threats is stored in the memory and emotional centers of the brain, such as the hippocampus and amygdala. This activates the body whenever a situation reminds the person of the traumatic event(s).
Crying is not a bad thing. In fact, it's how your body releases pent-up energy after a traumatic or distressing event. During your recovery period, let yourself feel your emotions. After crying, you may feel like a weight's been lifted off your shoulders.
Emotional Trauma Symptoms
Psychological Concerns: Anxiety and panic attacks, fear, anger, irritability, obsessions and compulsions, shock and disbelief, emotional numbing and detachment, depression, shame and guilt (especially if the person dealing with the trauma survived while others didn't)
Adults can generally recall events from 3–4 years old, with those that have primarily experiential memories beginning around 4.7 years old. Adults who experienced traumatic or abusive early childhoods report a longer period of childhood amnesia, ending around 5–7 years old.
The trauma inflicted in childhood changes the way a person connects with others. It can introduce a sense of shame or lack of self-worth, which can cause you to form relationships in unhealthy ways. For some people, this might take the form of making unhealthy attachments with unsuitable people.
In most cases, not being able to remember your childhood very clearly is completely normal. It's just the way human brains work. On the whole, childhood amnesia isn't anything to worry about, and it's possible to coax back some of those memories by using sights and smells to trigger them.
Smiling is a way to “protect” therapists.
By downplaying their pain they are attempting to minimize the upset they believe they are causing. Laughing while recounting something painful says, “I'm OK, you don't have to take care of me. ' Instead, clients are actually attempting to take care of their therapists.
If you can recall times when you've overreacted, and perhaps have even been surprised at your own reactions, this may be a sign of trauma. It's not uncommon for people suffering from emotional trauma to have feelings of shame and self-blame.
A traumatic event is time-based, while PTSD is a longer-term condition where one continues to have flashbacks and re-experiencing the traumatic event. In addition, to meet criteria for PTSD there must be a high level of ongoing distress and life impairment.
These chemicals boost your heart rate and blood pressure, so if you hold them in while trying not to cry, it can translate into chest tightness and heavy breathing. "Suppressing an emotion (in this case, frustration or sadness) actually heightens it and makes you feel worse," says psychologist Nikki Martinez, Psy. D.
Today's psychological thought largely concurs, emphasizing the role of crying as a mechanism that allows us to release stress and emotional pain. Crying is an important safety valve, largely because keeping difficult feelings inside — what psychologists call repressive coping — can be bad for our health.
Not crying can be healthy, but it also might be a sign of an underlying physical or emotional problem. Read on to learn about different reasons why you're not able to cry, the benefits of crying, and how to access your emotions if that's keeping your floodgates locked shut.
Aside from the immediate physical injuries children can experience through maltreatment, a child's reactions to abuse or neglect can have lifelong and even intergenerational impacts.
These traumas can be the result of intentional violence—such as child physical or sexual abuse, or domestic violence—or the result of natural disaster, accidents, or war. Young children also may experience traumatic stress in response to painful medical procedures or the sudden loss of a parent/caregiver.
Grief can be stored in various parts of the body, such as the heart, lungs, throat, and stomach. People may also experience physical sensations like heaviness in the chest or tightness in the throat when experiencing grief.
So, we may remember things by strengthening connections between neurons. Forgetting may happen when the connections between neurons are not as strong. In a sense, thoughts memories may not go anywhere, they may just become more difficult to access. It may seem pointless, but forgetting is very important.
Through the process of association and rehearsal, the content of short-term memory can become long-term memory. Long-term memories can last from a matter of days to as long as many decades.
"Decades of research has shown that we have the ability to voluntarily forget something, but how our brains do that is still being questioned." Much prior research on intentional forgetting has focussed on brain activity in the prefrontal cortex, and the brain's memory centre, the hippocampus.
Therapists also recognize that crying is not always a sign of distress but can also be cathartic and lead to personal growth. For example, some people may cry when they come to terms with difficult life experiences or when they achieve something meaningful that was previously out of reach.