Being able to trust each other is the key to a healthy and happy married life. It is impossible for two people to stick together (happily) in a relationship or a happy, fulfilling and healthy marriage without complete trust.
We lose trust in our partners for a host of reasons including abuse, infidelity and deceit. Once trust is broken we often experience tremendous anxiety and resentment, which can create a wall between ourselves and our partners. We might withdraw from those close to us and feel quite lonely.
How long does it take to rebuild trust in a marriage?
Rebuilding trust takes a significant amount of time and patience. It might take us several months or even years to fully be able to trust our loved one again. Along the way, we need to continue working on reestablishing trust slowly under the guidance of family counselors.
We can outline the process of rebuilding trust in four steps: (1) admit and repent, (2) define and exhibit trustworthy actions, (3) recognize and encourage trustworthy actions, and (4) trust in God.
Should you end a relationship if there is no trust?
Without trust, a relationship will not last. Trust is one of the cornerstones of any relationship—without it, two people cannot be comfortable with each other and the relationship will lack stability.
Just as trust can exist without love, love can exist without trust, but this usually happens under a specific set of circumstances. We may have family that we love but don't trust.
They become very accusatory. If someone doesn't trust you they might start accusing you of things that they fear you'll do to them, even if they don't have any evidence of you doing it. "When your partner doesn't trust you, they'll start accusing you of behavior you may not even be guilty of," explained Masini.
Betrayal trauma can also affect self-esteem, lead to distrust in relationships and mental health challenges. If your partner cheated on you, abused you, or ghosted you, you may feel betrayed. You might also feel betrayed if they don't prioritize you or you find that they're repeatedly unreliable.
Trust is broken when a spouse puts his or her own needs and desires ahead of what's best for their spouse and marriage. Also, trust is damaged when spouses break their promises and spousal expectations. We are all familiar with the well-known ways to break trust by lying and cheating, again those “big” things.
Trust is the foundation for your relationship and the key to love. When you trust your partner, then you feel secure that they won't leave in difficult times. This is the key for love to build and grow.
“A marriage may not be worth saving if your partner refuses to work on anything or take responsibility for creating a joint life,” Sherman says. “If they call all the shots and none of your needs are ever heeded, you may decide that the only way to create a healthy relationship is by yourself or with someone new.”
Yes, it's possible; however, rebuilding trust comes down to making the decision to remain in the relationship, having the discipline to do the work, believing that trust can be re-developed, and being vulnerable and open to change.
