Signs of Lying
A few of the potential red flags that might indicate that people are deceptive include: Being vague; offering few details. Repeating questions before answering them. Speaking in sentence fragments.
If they feel that someone closes in on their lies and raises questions, liars tend to get angry and defensive. Even if no one is outright accusing them, they have an overblown reaction due to their fear of being caught. It also acts as a distraction and helps take the spotlight off their lies.
When people lie and they are confronted with evidence that contradicts those lies, they may change their story or deny the truth altogether. They may also try to manipulate others to maintain their false story. Blaming others for their lies. They may try to deflect blame or shift responsibility onto others.
Spot a fake smile
But it's not just about the lips — it is the mouth/eye combo that is key in spotting a liar. “A truthful person smiles with their entire face, like the famous Mona Lisa,” says Patrick. “Crow's feet indicate honesty.”
How To Tell When Someone's Lying. The direction of their eyes: A 2012 study published in Plos One debunked the myth people look to the left when lying. A study by the University of Michigan found when participants lied, they maintained eye contact 70% of the time.
Skipping contractions: "I did not do it."
Instead of saying "I didn't do it," they'll say "I did not do it." Or they'll say "I cannot remember" instead of "I can't remember." They're basically overselling their lie by trying to sound more powerful and less refutable.
A narcissistic liar is a person who lies to get what they want. They are often charming and persuasive. But their primary goal is always self-promotion. They want to present themselves in a certain light and believe they can get away with it.
Sweating or dryness: Autonomic nervous system changes can trigger liars to sweat in the T-area of the face (upper lip, forehead, chin and around the mouth) or have dryness in the mouth and eyes — the person might excessively blink or squint, lick or bite their lips or swallow hard, according to Glass.
However, of the most common motives for telling lies, avoiding punishment is the primary motivator for both children and adults. Other typical reasons include protecting ourselves or others from harm, maintaining privacy, and avoiding embarrassment, to name a few.
An inability to bear the truth
Attorney Rebecca Zung writes about what happens when you catch a narcissist in a lie. They will either deny, deflect, devalue, and/or dismiss you.
Apologize. If you've heard someone say, “Narcissists never apologize,” they're not exactly right. While many traits of narcissism like entitlement, elitism, and arrogance make it unlikely someone with narcissistic traits will go the apology route, apologies are sometimes used with ulterior motives.
Narcissists can look people straight in the eye while shamelessly lying to them. In doing so, they do not make a face, even when confronted with probing questions and evidence of previous deceptions. It is normal for them to deny lies, make excuses, and project their behavior onto others.
Verbal Cues
Liars take longer to start answering questions than truth-tellers–but when they have time to plan, liars actually start their answers more quickly than truth-tellers. Liars' answers sound more discrepant and ambivalent, the structure of their stories is less logical, and their stories sound less plausible.
Tightened jaw and forehead
Liars also tend to tense up when they're not being truthful, and this can include tightening the jaw and forehead. Both are connected to the "mental effort and stress" associated with telling a lie, according to Wenner.
According to Andrew Pickett, trial attorney at Andrew Pickett Law, PLLC, "an increase in filler words such as 'uh' and 'um,' and a greater use of non-specific language" might mean you're being fed a falsehood. These words give the speaker more time to think and show low confidence in what they have to say.
While some lies may be told in attempts to protect, others can be used as an avenue for control and manipulation. If you know the type of lie that is being used, it can be easier to decide if the trust can be repaired or if the relationship will need to end.
Guilt is most likely when the liar shares values and respects the target of the lie. It is much harder to lie or cheat someone who has acted fairly. But if the wages are too low, the spouse cold and inconsiderate, the parent too strict – the liar may feel entitled to cheat, and feel no guilt about doing so.
Small deceptions can be used to increase the self-esteem of a partner, like telling them you love their new outfit or their cooking. Sometimes it's that you don't want to offend them, like telling them it's fine that they floss at the dinner table! These lies rarely cause harm and are accepted by society.