Educateyourself. Find out more about the disorder. It can help you understand the narcissist's strengths and weaknesses and learn how to handle them better. ...
Create boundaries. Be clear about your boundaries. ...
Speak up for yourself. When you need something, be clear and concise.
Disconnect from the narcissist's emotional energy. Be vague and don't argue back: “That's interesting.” “I understand how you feel.” Sometimes no response is very powerful and will upset them. Insist on calm, respectful tone and words. Leave if they become angry.
Clearly communicate your needs and set boundaries – in writing if possible. Take some quiet time by yourself to figure out what you will accept and won't accept from your narcissist. Become clear about the boundaries you need to set to shut them down.
“Your response is noted.” “Thanks for letting me know your thoughts; I'll consider them.” “Thank you for sharing your opinion.” “I'm willing to work this out, but I am not willing to be insulted or yelled at.”
Narcissists don't know they're hurting you. It doesn't even enter their minds. And, if you try to tell them how you feel, they get defensive and make you feel you're wrong again. In fact, they'll even rather “innocently” tell you: “I'm only trying to help you.”
Being sensitive to everything is just how their brains work. And if they are — by their own logic — being attacked, they will bite back even harder. However, by their nature, they may also want to hurt you too, because it makes them feel superior.
How do you get a narcissist to realize they are a narcissist?
Four ways to talk to a narcissist about narcissistic behavior.
Ask Clarifying Questions. A good way to diplomatically call someone's attention to his or her narcissistic behavior is to ask clarifying questions. ...
Use Humor and Wit. ...
Separate the Behavior from the Person. ...
Ask Directly Whether the Individual Is a Narcissist.
If you tell them you think they are a narcissist, your days will be numbered. They won't consider that you might have a point. Instead, they will make a mental note to get rid of you as soon as possible. Their MO is to replace insubordinate with someone fresh, who doesn't destabilize their fragile sense of self.
A narcissist may react aggressively to criticism in an effort to avoid re-experiencing the loneliness they suffered in the past. In response to criticism, a narcissist may also take great pains to devalue or invalidate the person criticizing them.
Narcissistic collapse happens when a person with narcissistic personality disorder experiences a failure, humiliation, or other blow to their secretly fragile self-esteem. Depending on the type of narcissist, collapse may look different and happen more frequently.
There will be no mature fighting or resolution if you are arguing with a toxic or narcissistic individual. You will be unable to have a calm and mature argument with them. They will often become extremely upset and aggressive. More times than not the conversation will shift to nonsensical rants.
Ridiculing you. Those who live with narcissism may find it difficult to hold positive and negative feelings for someone at the same time. As a result, things may get heated in an argument. You may experience insults, put-downs, and even mocking behaviors, like laughing as you express hurt.
Grooming a person, manipulating her into doubting her feelings, generating shame regarding her best qualities, and manipulatively creating dependency are four ways a narcissist destroys a person from the inside out.
Can living with a narcissist make you mentally ill?
Living or working with a narcissistic person can be incredibly challenging, often leading to feelings of inadequacy, self doubt, and anxiety. In more extreme cases, exposure to a narcissist can lead to clinical depression from the emotional abuse and torment a person has had to endure.
People high in narcissism are especially likely to act aggressively when they are provoked, insulted, humiliated, shamed, criticized, or threatened by others.
