To ask family not to kiss your baby, be direct, polite, and firm, explaining it's for the baby's developing immune system, referencing doctor's advice (like for RSV/flu season), and suggesting alternatives like handwashing or cuddles on the head/back. Frame it as protecting their health, not rejecting affection, and use "we" statements ("We're asking," "Our pediatrician said") for unity, even offering to wash hands before holding.
@Rachel as a scientist, I can tell you that others kissing babies under the age of 6 months is risky due to the transmission of HSV, RSV and other illnesses. That's why it is recommended that parents only kiss their babies for the first while.
If you are worried about kissing, it makes sense to me that the 12 week mark is a good transition. Fevers before 12 weeks are an immediate trip to the ER basically, and saying no to kisses is in an aim to prevent infections, and infections cause fevers, so I'd say 12 weeks is a good goal.
Give your MIL a very serious conversation about why you don't want her to kiss the baby. Scare her. Tell her he could die. Then tell her that if she can't control herself she will lose privileges to see the baby. If she's going in for a kiss immediately remove yourselves and go home or kick her out.
The 7-7-7 rule of parenting generally refers to dedicating three daily 7-minute periods of focused, undistracted connection with your child (morning, after school, bedtime) to build strong bonds and make them feel seen and valued. A less common interpretation involves three developmental stages (0-7 years of play, 7-14 years of teaching, 14-21 years of advising), while another offers a stress-relief breathing technique (7-second inhale, hold, exhale).
Be Firm and Direct. “I prefer people to ask before touching her.” This clearly lets someone know that you must give permission. “Let me be straightforward: we're not letting anyone touch our baby right now.”
Begin the conversation by calmly and politely explaining the reason behind the rule. You can say something like, "We've chosen not to have the baby kissed to minimize the risk of exposing them to germs and illnesses. Their immune system is still developing, and we want to do everything we can to keep them healthy."
The 7 key danger signs for newborns, often highlighted by organizations like the WHO, are not feeding well, convulsions, fast breathing, severe chest indrawing, lethargy/unconsciousness (movement only when stimulated), high or low temperature, and jaundice (yellow skin/soles) or signs of local infection like an infected umbilical stump, requiring immediate medical attention.
The first three months with your baby often seem the hardest. Sleep-deprived parents can feel overwhelmed, but that is normal and you will quickly learn how to read your baby's cues and personality. Don't worry about “spoiling” your baby at this stage.
That wide-eyed, round-mouthed “O face” your baby pulls isn't just for dramatic effect—it's actually part of newborn talking. This funny little expression usually means your baby's intrigued, alert, or trying to make sense of what they're seeing. It's their way of saying, “Whoa, what's that?”—without the vocabulary.
Avoid Kissing: Refrain from kissing a baby unless you are their parent or main carer. Even then, avoid kissing if you're unwell. Stay Away When Ill: Do not visit a baby if you're ill or have recently been ill, including conditions like colds, cold sores, or gastrointestinal issues.
Flexibility is a crucial component to gentle parenting, and equally important is parents' ability to hold clear and firm boundaries. The key to holding boundaries in gentle parenting is to incorporate empathy, respect, and understanding.
What are good hygiene practices when a new person is introduced to the baby? Anyone who comes in close contact with a newborn should make sure to wash their hands first. It can also be helpful to remove any jewelry on the hands.
Breastfeeding is the gold standard in infant nutrition, and it's the number-one way to support your baby's immune system.
While the AAP doesn't mention a specific age for when it's okay to start kissing a baby, most experts recommend waiting at least 2-3 months, or even longer during RSV, flu, and cold season.
Discourage anyone who is not a close family member or carer from kissing your baby. The safest place to kiss your baby is on the top of their head. Kissing your baby near their mouth, nose or eyes should be avoided. People with a current cold sore, or a recent history of cold sores, should not kiss your baby.
11 Polite (But Firm) Tips to Help You Tell Family and Friends Not to Kiss Your Baby
Hold your baby until they're in a deeper sleep. Babies start in 'active sleep' (with faster, uneven breathing) and move into a deeper sleep after about 20 minutes. That's a good time to transfer them into their sleeping place. Many babies don't like being put down into a cot.
SIDS is less common after 8 months of age, but parents and caregivers should continue to follow safe sleep practices to reduce the risk of SIDS and other sleep-related causes of infant death until baby's first birthday. More than 90% of all SIDS deaths occur before 6 months of age.
10 Ways to Nurture Your Baby's Brain Before Birth
The "9-minute rule" in parenting, or the 9-Minute Theory, suggests that focusing on three specific 3-minute windows each day creates significant connection and security for children: the first three minutes after they wake up, the three minutes after they return from school/daycare, and the last three minutes before sleep, emphasizing distraction-free, quality time to boost well-being and reduce parental guilt.
The 7-7-7 rule of parenting generally refers to dedicating three daily 7-minute periods of focused, undistracted connection with your child (morning, after school, bedtime) to build strong bonds and make them feel seen and valued. A less common interpretation involves three developmental stages (0-7 years of play, 7-14 years of teaching, 14-21 years of advising), while another offers a stress-relief breathing technique (7-second inhale, hold, exhale).
The "3-3-3 Rule" for kids is a simple mindfulness technique to manage anxiety by grounding them in the present moment: first, name three things they can see; next, identify three sounds they hear; and finally, move three different parts of their body. This engages their senses, shifts focus from worries, and helps them regain control when feeling overwhelmed, like during test anxiety or social situations.