How cats feel when picked up varies greatly: many find it stressful and vulnerable due to loss of control, while some with strong trust and specific personalities genuinely enjoy it, but most prefer to initiate affection on their own terms, as being held isn't a natural cat behavior, making it crucial to watch for signs of discomfort like squirming or flattened ears.
Cats will show you. If they don't want you to pick them up or hug them, they will run/walkaway/move or push you while hugging. Mine loves it if I pick him up and walk around with him while I pet him and he purrs. It's my fav moment too but sometimes he simply doesn't want that kind of attention.
While some cats may tolerate being picked up and hugged, most do not; cats are independent creatures and prefer to be in control of their movements. Picking them up and hugging them can make them feel trapped and uncomfortable.
If some cats had their choice, many would prefer to never be picked up and held. For a cat, there's tremendous security in having all paws on the ground and the ability to move at will. For many cats, being picked up and lifted off the ground creates stress.
While many cats enjoy being hugged and closely held, others feel more comfortable with their paws firmly on the ground. For those who do like being held, they often have specific preferences about how they're positioned in your arms.
The 3:3:3 Rule: Help Your New Cat Adjust to Their Home The 3:3:3 rule explains some general expectations for the transition process and some tips on how to support your cat through each stage: 3 days for initial acclimatization, 3 weeks for settling in, and by 3 months, they should be comfortable and at ease in their ...
To apologize to a cat, use a soft, calm tone, offer treats or toys, initiate slow blinking, give space if needed, and respect their boundaries for physical touch, focusing on actions and tone over words to rebuild trust and affection. Don't force interaction, as they respond to reassurance and positive experiences more than human language.
The top "silent killers" in cats are Chronic Kidney Disease (CKD), often going undetected until 75% kidney failure, and Hypertension (High Blood Pressure), which damages organs without obvious signs until blindness or seizures occur, notes Muirfield Animal Hospital, Pet Health Network, www.springwoodvets.com.au, Close Veterinary Clinic, Killarney Animal Hospital, Physicians Mutual Insurance, Sykesville Veterinary Clinic, Mona Vale Veterinary Hospital, Nimbus Pet Hospital, Hill's Pet Nutrition, Covetrus North America, ASPCA Pet Insurance and PetCareRx. Other serious conditions include Hyperthyroidism, Heart Disease (like HCM), and Fatty Liver Disease (Hepatic Lipidosis).
Signs your cat has imprinted on you include following you everywhere, kneading you (making biscuits), rubbing against you (bunting), slow blinking, bringing you "gifts," grooming you, and showing you their vulnerable belly as a sign of deep trust and seeing you as family. They'll also greet you excitedly, sleep near or on you, and communicate with you using unique vocalizations.
Cats get most annoyed by loud, sudden noises (vacuums, thunder), strong smells (citrus, vinegar), changes in routine, dirty litter boxes, and unwanted handling like being picked up or stared at, as these disrupt their sense of security and sensory balance, triggering their sensitive hearing and instincts for control and safety. Unexpected movements, unfamiliar scents, and being forced into costumes also cause significant stress and annoyance for felines.
Research suggests that cats' short term memories last around 16 hours, which means they can remember recent events and react accordingly. If a cat has had a minor scare—such as a loud noise or being bumped by accident—it may remember and act skittishly for a short period.
Cats form strong bonds with people, recognizing them as part of their family and relying on them for physical and emotional support. If you're there for your cat when she needs you, then you can rest assured that your cat really loves you!
The most common mistakes are forcing a cat to be held or not supporting their body in a way that makes them feel comfortable and safe. According to our experts, cat parents should avoid: Picking up a cat by the scruff of the neck.
To say "I love you" in cat language, use slow blinks, offer gentle head/cheek rubs (scent glands), let them initiate contact, provide interactive play, and simply share calm presence, mimicking their natural affection signals like grooming and trust-building.
The "4 8 12 hug rule," popularized by family therapist Virginia Satir, suggests humans need 4 hugs a day for survival, 8 for maintenance, and 12 for growth, emphasizing the physiological and psychological benefits of touch, like stress reduction and oxytocin release, though studies suggest hug length (around 20 seconds) matters more than just the number.
Here are some of the top signs your cat loves you:
As cats have great memories, it is likely that they can go through a period of missing their old owners, especially if they had a strong bond. However, by giving them plenty of time to adjust, affection and space when they need it, you'll notice them starting to form bonds with their new family members in time.
The results were surprising. About 64% of the cats showed signs of “secure attachment”, meaning they trusted their owners and felt safe in their presence. That's actually a higher percentage than dogs, who scored 58% in similar studies.
Cats hate strong, pungent, or bitter smells, with citrus (lemon, orange), vinegar, and harsh cleaning chemicals (ammonia, bleach) topping the list, along with certain herbs (lavender, eucalyptus, rosemary) and spices (cinnamon, pepper) that can irritate their sensitive noses, with some being toxic if ingested. Strong odors like spoiled food, other animals' scents, or menthol are also highly disliked.
Cat behavior red flags signal potential medical or emotional issues, including sudden changes in eating/drinking, litter box problems, excessive vocalization, increased hiding, aggression, lethargy, or changes in grooming (like overgrooming or stopping). Because cats hide illness well, any significant deviation from their normal routine, such as increased thirst, appetite changes, or unusual hiding, warrants an urgent vet visit to rule out serious underlying conditions like kidney disease, hyperthyroidism, diabetes, or pain.
Cats do remember negative experiences, but they don't dwell on resentment the way people do. Instead, they react based on learned associations and their need for safety. With patience, consistency, and care, most cats return to positive behaviors quickly.
Signs Your Cat Misses You
It's all in the subtleties. A meow that echoes through an empty house or a change in dining habits can be a feline's way of saying, "Where have you been?" Cats may also snuggle up to your worn clothes, finding comfort in your scent. It's like they're saying, "I knead you back home, human!"
Aggressive signals are especially likely to be displayed if a cat can't escape the thing he fears. Often the best way to deal with a defensively aggressive cat is to simply avoid him until he calms down.
Your cat will probably forgive you for the occasional, truly necessary bath—but he'll always remember it. That wary look when you walk toward the bathroom, the way he pauses at the sound of running water, that's not moodiness; that's memory doing its job.