The behaviour of the narcissist is regulated by a series of routines developed by rote learning and by repetitive patterns of experience. The narcissist finds change extremely distasteful and unsettling. He is a creature of habit.
Narcissists are motivated by feeling superior and expanding their power, and so the only things that matter when helping others are receiving adulation, fame, influence, opportunities, notoriety, and other resources. They dont actually care about others because to them other people are just things to use.
Do narcissists view chores as beneath them? Some certainly do, but not all of them. Narcissists have an over-inflated sense of self-importance, but this can manifest in different ways. For some, cleaning and doing housework is a job they consider too demeaning for them.
Narcissistic personality disorder involves a pattern of self-centered, arrogant thinking and behavior, a lack of empathy and consideration for other people, and an excessive need for admiration. Others often describe people with NPD as cocky, manipulative, selfish, patronizing, and demanding.
They will have a violent, excessive, and disorderly reaction to the rejection. In a nutshell, they want and will try to create a scene. Simply put, narcissists hate being ignored. They probably want to make you feel ashamed, regretful, and rattled.
Narcissistic rage ranges from direct confrontation with name-calling and hurtful slurs, to calculated, closed down reactions like giving their partner the silent treatment for hours at a time. "They give you the cold shoulder, or they walk out and they find another woman," Greenberg said.
Focus on Choices
One key to dealing with a narcissist is focusing on choices, both yours and theirs. People with NPD often insist others treat them unfairly and don't give them the respect they're due. They fail to see how their own behaviors could impact the way others interact with them.
They like to have all the attention on them, which is why they cut their victims off from their friends and family. Often, they will flip between being a victim, being abusive, and being the hero. This keeps everyone around them on their toes because it is so erratic and confusing. It's called the "drama triangle."
Here are some narcissism red flags to look out for: Lacking empathy. They seem unable or unwilling to have empathy for others, and they appear to have no desire for emotional intimacy. Unrealistic sense of entitlement.
The sobering truth is that narcissists often want you to do what is best for them despite what it may cost you. Many narcissists believe that fairness or a win-win approach offer them little advantage. Instead, narcissists tend to focus on credit and blame, winning and losing, and who is superior and inferior.
Narcissists may show you love and act in loving ways, but this tends to be conditional, in that displays of love depend on what you can give them in return. For people with NPD, relationships tend to be transactional. Love is not self-serving, proud, boastful, exploitative, or envious.
Narcissistic collapse happens when a person with narcissistic personality disorder experiences a failure, humiliation, or other blow to their secretly fragile self-esteem. Depending on the type of narcissist, collapse may look different and happen more frequently.
In narcissists' efforts to avoid blame, they often combine several fake apologies at once, such as, “I am sorry if I said anything to offend you, but I have strong opinions. Maybe you're too sensitive,” or, “I guess I should tell you I am sorry. But you know I would never deliberately hurt you.
“It's not my fault, it's because of you/money/stress/work.” “If you wouldn't have done this, I wouldn't have done that.” “You knew what you were getting into; this is just the way that I am.”
Unless they have had a lot of successful psychotherapy for their NPD, they do not feel guilt, shame, or self-doubt so long as their narcissistic defenses hold. This means that they do not think there is anything for them to regret, no matter how hurt you feel.
Eventually a narcissist will start to move on from their relationship with an empath. They will likely find someone else to spend their time with or boss around and let their previous partner go. This can be a good thing for the empath, since they won't have to be concerned about this mate any longer.
They won't accept “no.” They hoover in an attempt to rekindle the relationship or stay friends after a breakup or divorce. A research study showed that narcissists and psychopaths tend to stay friends with their ex for selfish reasons. They try to stay in your life or seduce and convince you to return.