Yes, many men experience guilt, regret, and complex emotions when leaving their wives, often feeling responsible for the broken vows, family pain, and financial strain, though some might not show it due to self-protection, societal pressure, or different motivations, while studies show a significant portion of men (around 30-39%) later regret divorce. Feelings vary widely; some men feel immense guilt about hurting their families, while others might feel relief initially, only to face loneliness or regret later when the new reality sets in, sometimes regretting the decision for years, as seen in personal accounts on Quora and Reddit discussions.
As the emotional dust settles, regret often takes hold, especially after that pivotal first year. Many people feel regret after divorce, with about 27% of women and 32% of men regretting the choice.
While many factors contribute, many experts point to poor communication (especially criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling) and a breakdown in emotional connection/trust, often stemming from dishonesty or disrespect, as the #1 things that destroy marriages, eroding intimacy and making partners feel unheard and unloved over time. Infidelity, financial stress, and shifting priorities (like putting family/in-laws above spouse) are also major contributors that feed these core issues.
They might feel like a failure, they might feel shame or embarrassment about the divorce. These feelings can cause sadness, too. And, a man might still love his ex-wife. He might have regrets about the way he treated her or the way he handled things, or not trying therapy when she wanted to.
The apology overload: when words become a deluge
The main reason why a man apologizes so much is the overwhelming feeling of guilt he has to carry from his wrongdoings. In other words, he may be feeling so sorry for any single mistake that he ends up on a spree of apologizing for anything and everything.
Our exploration of the four major pain points for men — emotional dismissal, breakdown of trust, unfulfilled goals, and relationship struggles or loss — highlights the complexity and depth of men's emotional experiences.
But it does provide some rough guidelines as to how soon may be too soon to make long-term commitments and how long may be too long to stick with a relationship. Each of the three numbers—three, six, and nine—stands for the month that a different common stage of a relationship tends to end.
Various data suggest that the spouse who decided to call it quits regrets divorce more often than the other party.
Toxic relationships, being used, feeling emotionally spent, or meeting someone new could also contribute to what makes a man leave his wife. A wife left behind may be wondering what happened to her once-happy relationship. Going to couples counseling and communicating with her husband may help save the marriage.
The biggest red flags in a guy include controlling behavior, excessive jealousy, manipulation (like gaslighting), lack of empathy, and anger management issues, often seen through verbal abuse, aggression, or emotional outbursts, all indicating deeper emotional instability and poor communication. Other significant signs are disrespect, constant criticism, dishonesty, refusing emotional intimacy, blame-shifting, and a pattern of love bombing followed by devaluation, suggesting an unhealthy dynamic.
The Five Big Marriage Killers and How to Avoid Them
The Three A's – Adultery, Abuse, and Addiction
Therapists would love for every marriage to be able to be saved, but that just simply isn't realistic. Every marriage therapist knows when a couple comes into their office and are dealing with one of what we call, The Three A's …
The 777 rule for marriage is a relationship guideline to keep couples connected by scheduling specific, regular quality time: a date night every 7 days, a night away (getaway) every 7 weeks, and a romantic holiday every 7 months, often without kids, to foster intimacy, reduce stress, and prevent routine from overtaking the relationship. It's about consistent, intentional efforts to prioritize the partnership.
Yes, a man can cheat and still love his wife, as infidelity can occur for many reasons that are not always rooted in a lack of love for his wife. Because what men regard to be love is care, support, attention, and communication.
One reason women feel happier than men after a divorce, despite the financial repercussions, could be that “women who enter into an unhappy marriage feel much more liberated after divorce than their male counterparts,” according to Yannis Georgellis, director of the university's Centre for Research in Employment, ...
The four behaviors that predict over 90% of divorces, known as Dr. John Gottman's "Four Horsemen," are Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling, which erode connection, respect, and safety, leading to relationship breakdown. These destructive communication patterns, if persistent, signal that a marriage is likely to end, with contempt being the most damaging.
Approximately 18% of men reported one spouse's unfaithfulness as the reason behind the divorce filing. That isn't to say that almost one in five men file for divorce because their spouse cheated. Some men had extramarital affairs that pushed them into filing for divorce.
The Misery Stage is where many couples find themselves considering a marriage separation or divorce. Many believe the pain is too intense. It may seem that too much has happened and there is no way to forgive and move on.
The Four Horsemen
Usually, these four horsemen clip-clop into the heart of a marriage in the following order: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling.
Lack of commitment is the most common reason given by divorcing couples according to a recent national survey. Here are the reasons given and their percentages: Lack of commitment 73% Argue too much 56%
Others might take years to fully process the loss, especially if the divorce was unexpected or if the man was deeply invested in the marital role. Emotions can also resurface unpredictably, triggered by milestones or memories, even long after the legal process has concluded.
Women initiate the majority of divorces, with studies showing they file in around 70% of cases, a rate that increases to about 90% for college-educated women, according to research from the American Sociological Association (ASA). This trend highlights that women often bear the emotional burden, experience unmet needs, and have greater financial independence, making them more likely to seek divorce when dissatisfied with the relationship.
survived the dreaded two-year mark (i.e. the most common time period when couples break up), then you're destined to be together forever… right? Unfortunately, the two-year mark isn't the only relationship test to pass, nor do you get to relax before the seven-year itch.
The 3-squeeze rule involves kissing your partner post-squeeze. The 3-squeeze rule is a trend that's currently going viral on TikTok. It's defined by kissing your partner after they've squeezed your hand 3 times.
A date night every 7 days An overnight trip every 7 weeks A vacation (kid free) every 7 months.