Phone calls This can be an issue for a lot of introverts, but it seems to be a particular difficulty for INFJs. Personally, I don't mind being on the phone to catch up with a friend or someone I know. In that situation, I can often be on the phone for hours without thinking twice.
INFJs enjoy deep conversations with intellectually curious individuals. They enjoy talking about philosophy, psychology, religion, and a lot of the “taboo” subjects that many other people avoid. They enjoy asking questions, looking for answers and understanding how other people see the world.
Reading too much into a situation
INFJs can appear very awkward when their intuition kicks in and they start reading into a situation. For instance, if someone is being sweeter to the boss than usual, you may infer that they are doing it to get ahead at work.
In fact, INFJ personalities are talkative and bubbly, but only around people they trust and know well. In large and unknown social settings, they rarely take the lead and expect others to keep their end of the conversation.
These INFJs will willingly send a first text. But if they have repeated bad experiences after being the one to initiate contact, they may become unwilling to text first anymore. They may want to just wait for the other person to show that they're interested.
Kindness. As sensitive personalities, INFJs feel attracted to people who show kindness towards others. Extraverted Feeling is their auxiliary function, which means INFJs try to connect in a gentle way, and appreciate those who can do the same. Most INFJs also strive to make a positive impact on the world.
INFJs tend to be guarded about their physical space, except for when it comes to family and VERY close friends. If they're finding excuses to touch your hand, bump up against you, or hug you, then it probably means they have feelings for you.
INFJs also feel embarrassed when they cry in front of others or react emotionally to criticism. They also experience “second-hand embarrassment”. This occurs when they empathize too strongly with someone who has done something awkward or is embarrassing themselves.
9. You cry easily. This one is especially problematic, as it often happens at very inopportune or embarrassing moments. Like all Feeling types, INFJs are prone to random tears.
Awkward Small Talk
But just because we understand why people do small talk doesn't mean we like it. Trying to fill awkward silences and come up with small talk-level things to say is something most INFJs (and indeed most introverts) hate.
INFJs detest attention-seeking behaviors and melodrama. Their strong intuition combined with their awareness of emotions makes it easy for them to spot when someone is being fake or is always seeking the spotlight. Emotionally manipulative movies and TV shows also get on their nerves.
Because they are often reserved, high-achieving individuals with high expectations of both themselves and others, INFJs can be intimidating to other personality types. Since INFJs are also the rarest personality type, many people misunderstand them.
Crowds, noise, frequent interruptions - INFJs need their personal space and may experience great anxiety if they have too much contact with people in one day. Faced with such provocations, there's a risk that you will spread yourself so thin responding to other people's problems that you neglect your own needs.
INFJs never make the first move.
It's not completely impossible for an INFJ to make the first move, but it's highly unlikely for an INFJ to put themselves out there, especially with a stranger. Even when an INFJ knows that the other person is into them, they probably still won't make the first move.
Popular hobbies for the INFJ include writing, art appreciation, cultural events, reading, socializing in small, intimate settings, and playing or listening to music.
They want to hear the secret thoughts you're afraid to utter. How you're really feeling, even though you said you're “doing fine.” INFJs love discussing personal, big-idea topics. They especially love helping other people understand their complicated, messy emotions and grow.
INFJs are sensitive souls who are easily overwhelmed, but they have their limits. If they feel stressed by their environment, or the people in it, they'll tend to cry or become very quiet and want to be alone. Some INFJs will be cold, sarcastic and very blunt or speak to someone only on a very superficial level.
Usually, they will get more withdrawn and stuck in their head when they're angry. They might try to shut off noise, lights, or find a room they can hide away in to deal with their thoughts and charged emotions. Some INFJs shut down and stop talking and reacting, trying to sort out their thoughts inside.
INFJs are not easy to read, but they can easily read others. INFJs pick up on other people's moods, energy or intentions and can read them like a book. But they hide their own feelings behind a poker face, so it's tough for others to read them.
INFJs are capable of mechanical memorization, but the amount retained this way is less than from memory based on understanding. INFJs are capable of accurately reproducing received information, especially if they associate it with any feelings.
INFJ INFJs actually do become very upset if their loved ones ignore them for a long time.
INTP (“The Logician”)
In the world of personality theory, the INTP and INFJ pairing has been nicknamed “The Golden Pair” because these two types can be highly compatible.
As an INFJ you need to be able to “talk out” your feelings, but some types are less confident in their ability to do this. Thinking-Judging types, for example, tend to struggle with externalizing their emotions. They're more likely to show their affection through acts of service or verbalize their thoughts and plans.
The INFJ stare is often characterized by its intensity. It may seem like an endless gaze, as if the INFJ is looking right into your soul. They may appear thoughtful and analytical—like they're deeply assessing you or the situation.