In Australia, you generally cannot directly sue your wife for adultery or for damages like emotional distress, as it's not a criminal offense or a standalone civil claim under family law, but infidelity can influence divorce outcomes, especially regarding property if marital funds were wasted or if it relates to family violence, affecting asset division, spousal maintenance, or custody in severe cases. While revenge suits against a spouse or their lover are generally ineffective in Australia, focusing on your rights in property/parenting matters within divorce proceedings is the legal path.
Consider these steps to promote healing:
Unfortunately, the answer is no. There are no criminal or civil penalties for cheating in a relationship. You can't sue for emotional distress, loss of trust, or the breakdown of your marriage caused by infidelity.
Most jurisdictions do not allow suing a spouse solely for adultery but consider it during divorce settlements or custody decisions. Initiating divorce requires filing a petition citing appropriate grounds, which may include fault like adultery if applicable.
Infidelity may not only have a destructive impact on the relationship, which may lead to separation or divorce, but may negatively affect the partners' overall emotional wellbeing, leading to enhanced depressive symptoms andlowered self-esteem [3].
The 7-7-7 rule is a structured method for couples to regularly reconnect, involving a date night every 7 days, a weekend getaway every 7 weeks, and a kid-free vacation every 7 months.
Cheating usually has little to no impact on how assets are split. Even when one spouse has an affair, the court does not use that as a deciding factor for dividing property or debts. However, infidelity might come into discussion if community funds were used on the affair.
Most adultery cases rely on circumstantial evidence, which suggests the occurrence of adultery without directly proving the sexual act. This can include: Communications: Text messages, emails, and social media interactions that suggest a romantic or sexual relationship.
Adultery can be used as grounds for divorce but complicates the proceedings. Infidelity can impact the property division if marital funds were involved in the affair. Alimony can be influenced by adultery in some instances. Child custody is affected by adultery when the affair directly impacts the child.
Generally, however, spouses cannot sue one another for the emotional damage caused by an affair. Why not? In IIED lawsuits, the defendant's conduct must be more than insulting, bothersome or offensive. The conduct has to be considered so “extreme and outrageous” that it “shocks the conscience” of the average person.
court filing fee of $197. if claim is not defended: legal fee of $600 (2 hours) to prepare court documents for default judgment. if claim is defended: legal fee of $1200 (4 hours) to read the defence and advise whether the firm is likely to be successful. legal fee for attending initial court appearance $900 (3 hours)
Infidelity is the broad term for any breach of trust in a relationship (emotional or physical), while adultery is a specific type of infidelity involving sexual intercourse by a married person with someone other than their spouse, making it a legal and moral violation of marriage. Essentially, all adultery is infidelity, but not all infidelity is adultery; infidelity can include emotional affairs, kissing, or inappropriate communication, even in non-marital relationships, whereas adultery requires marriage and physical sex.
This section outlines practical legal steps that can be taken if you suspect or have confirmed that your spouse is engaging in an extramarital affair.
The 80/20 rule in relationships explains cheating as the temptation to abandon a solid partner (80% good) for someone new who seems to offer the missing 20% of needs, a pursuit often leading to regret as the new person lacks the original 80%. Infidelity often arises from focusing on flaws (the 20%) rather than appreciating the substantial good (the 80%), making an affair partner seem appealing for fulfilling that small gap, but ultimately resulting in losing the valuable foundation of the primary relationship.
Just because a spouse cheated doesn't mean the marriage is doomed. There are always ways to get your marriage back on track if both parties are willing to accept and forgive what happened.
Soft cheating (or micro-cheating) involves subtle, often digital, behaviors that cross relationship boundaries and breach trust without being full-blown infidelity, like excessive social media interaction with others, hiding messages, or maintaining secretive contact with an ex, often stemming from a need for validation but eroding intimacy and causing insecurity.
If you notice them early, you have a better shot at turning things around.
While the depth of and commitment to love can play a role in infidelity, this is rarely the whole story. Many women who cheat still deeply love their spouse. They stray because they are seeking something they feel is missing in their marriage.
Emotional cheating is an emotional affair that involves having non-sexual emotional intimacy with someone who is not the individual's romantic partner. Someone having an emotional affair may hide it from their partner or even use deception to keep the relationship a secret.
The biggest divorce mistake is often letting emotions control decisions, leading to impulsive actions, but failing to seek early legal and financial advice is equally critical, as it can severely jeopardize your long-term financial security and rights, especially regarding property division and child custody. Other major errors include hiding assets, not focusing on children's needs, and using the process for revenge rather than resolution.
To successfully prove adultery, the following elements must be shown beyond reasonable doubt:
Unfortunately, cheating does not impact what a wife is entitled to during the divorce, so an unfaithful spouse is still entitled to half of all community property. Under the community property rule, each spouse is allowed to keep separate property, such as anything they owned prior to marriage, gifts, and inheritance.
The four behaviors that predict over 90% of divorces, known as Dr. John Gottman's "Four Horsemen," are Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling, which erode connection, respect, and safety, leading to relationship breakdown. These destructive communication patterns, if persistent, signal that a marriage is likely to end, with contempt being the most damaging.
While many factors contribute, many experts point to poor communication (especially criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling) and a breakdown in emotional connection/trust, often stemming from dishonesty or disrespect, as the #1 things that destroy marriages, eroding intimacy and making partners feel unheard and unloved over time. Infidelity, financial stress, and shifting priorities (like putting family/in-laws above spouse) are also major contributors that feed these core issues.
Infidelity is the broad term for any breach of trust in a relationship (emotional or physical), while adultery is a specific type of infidelity involving sexual intercourse by a married person with someone other than their spouse, making it a legal and moral violation of marriage. Essentially, all adultery is infidelity, but not all infidelity is adultery; infidelity can include emotional affairs, kissing, or inappropriate communication, even in non-marital relationships, whereas adultery requires marriage and physical sex.