While you technically can empty a joint bank account as both spouses have equal access, it's generally a bad idea in a divorce, as judges often see it as hiding assets, which can severely harm your case, reduce your settlement, and damage your credibility, even if the money was yours. You can withdraw money for immediate needs, but draining accounts entirely to leave your spouse with nothing usually results in the court ordering that money returned or counted against you, potentially affecting custody too, so it's best to consult a lawyer before taking significant funds.
It's possible to transfer money before a divorce, but it is a delicate process which you should not attempt on your own. If there's a chance your spouse will empty your joint bank account, you may want to consider transferring some of the funds to a separate account.
The biggest divorce mistake is often letting emotions control decisions, leading to impulsive actions, but failing to seek early legal and financial advice is equally critical, as it can severely jeopardize your long-term financial security and rights, especially regarding property division and child custody. Other major errors include hiding assets, not focusing on children's needs, and using the process for revenge rather than resolution.
Yes, hiding assets from your spouse during divorce is illegal. It violates disclosure laws and can lead to serious consequences, including financial penalties, contempt of court, or even criminal fraud charges.
You don't have to wait until you are divorced. If you get a divorce and haven't worked out your property arrangements yet, you must apply to court for property orders within 12 months of your divorce becoming final. If you were in a de facto relationship, you must apply within two years of the date of separation.
The most common examples are gifted and inherited assets. Money or property given to one spouse as a gift, or received through an inheritance, is generally considered separate property and cannot be touched in a divorce, as long as it has been kept separate.
Moving out during a divorce is often considered a big mistake because it can negatively affect child custody, create immediate financial hardship (paying two households), weaken your negotiating power, and make it difficult to access important documents, while courts prefer maintaining the status quo for stability unless there's abuse. Voluntarily leaving can signal to a judge that you're less involved with the children and the home, making it harder to argue for equal time or possession later, even if your name is on the mortgage or lease.
Don't rush and make emotional decisions, turn down opportunities to spend time with your children, say bad things about your spouse, take on more debt, hide income and assets, get a new boyfriend or girlfriend, or say anything on social media about your situation.
The short answer is yes, legally your spouse can withdraw money from a joint account during separation. Banks recognize both account holders as owners with equal access rights. This reality leaves many people vulnerable when a marriage falls apart and one spouse drains shared accounts.
You can subpoena your spouse's financial and bank records.
They look for abnormal withdrawals or transfers. Sometimes, the transfers include the trail to the hidden bank accounts, as it may indicate into what financial institution and/or account the money was transferred. You should scour each account carefully.
The 3 C's of divorce are typically Communication, Compromise, and Cooperation, principles that help divorcing couples, especially those with children, navigate the process more smoothly by focusing on respectful dialogue, finding middle grounds, and working together for the children's well-being. Applying these fosters less conflict and better outcomes, prioritizing the children's welfare over past grievances.
Avoid making statements in anger. Never send emails when you are angry or upset. These will come back to haunt you in the divorce. Remember that this will be a tough experience, but you will get through it and will become empowered in the process.
The 7-7-7 rule for couples is a guideline for maintaining strong connection by scheduling dedicated time: a date night every 7 days, a weekend getaway (or night away) every 7 weeks, and a longer, kid-free vacation every 7 months, all designed to fight drift and routine by ensuring consistent, intentional quality time, though flexibility is key.
Whilst it is possible to finalise your divorce or civil partnership dissolution without sorting out the financial arrangements, it is not usually recommended. Simply terminating the marriage or civil partnership does not prevent either party from claiming financial provision.
During a divorce, Courts typically issue orders to prevent spouses from selling, transferring, or otherwise disposing of marital assets. These orders are designed to maintain the financial status quo until the Court can equitably divide the spouses' marital property.
If both spouses' names are on the title deeds, they will each be entitled to a share of the property and this would be assumed to be a 50:50 split unless there is a legal agreement in place that specifies otherwise.
The no contact rule is a strategy where former spouses limit or eliminate direct communication to promote healing, reduce conflict, and comply with legal agreements.
The default rule is that savings and investments built up during a marriage are subject to a fair distribution between both parties. There are always exceptions, however—and “fair distribution” may not mean a 50-50 split.
In most circumstances, either person on a joint checking account can withdraw money from and close the account.
The "3-3-3 rule" for breakups is a guideline suggesting 3 days for emotional release, 3 weeks for reflection, and 3 months for intentional rebuilding/healing, helping people process a split in stages. It's a simplified framework for managing grief, contrasting with longer models, and aims to create space for personal growth by focusing on self-improvement and gaining perspective after the initial shock of the breakup, though individual healing times vary greatly and aren't set in stone.
If you're in the process of separating from your partner, here are some things to consider, if it's safe to do so:
Can you date while separated? Yes. If you're ready to, you are free to date other people while separated. Your separation agreement is critical though because if the timing of the relationship comes into question during your divorce your relationship may be considered as an affair or adultery.
The four behaviors that predict over 90% of divorces, known as Dr. John Gottman's "Four Horsemen," are Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling, which erode connection, respect, and safety, leading to relationship breakdown. These destructive communication patterns, if persistent, signal that a marriage is likely to end, with contempt being the most damaging.
Why We Feel Regret After Divorce
Should You Move Out? None of this is to say you can't move out during a divorce. You may need to, especially if a living situation becomes unsafe. But in general, unless the court specifically orders you to, or it's a safety issue, we don't recommend vacating until temporary orders are in place.