It's okay to ask your therapist about their life. Any questions you have in therapy are valid and are likely relevant to the therapeutic process. Whether your therapist answers the question and shares personal information can depend on their individual personality, philosophy, and approach to your treatment.
“It totally makes sense for a person to be asking questions of someone with whom they're going to be sharing their intimate self.” The short answer to the question is: Yes. If you have a question, you should ask. Your questions are valid and likely relevant to the therapeutic process.
Early in the relationship, clients may ask personal questions to assess the ability of the clinician to help them. It is most important not to be defensive of these questions. They are not only legitimate, but as a consumer the client has the right to know about your professional experience.
The short answer is that you can tell your therapist anything – and they hope that you do. It's a good idea to share as much as possible, because that's the only way they can help you.
So, rest assured that it's probably fine to ask your therapist how they're doing and other small talk questions, but Dr. Babbel says there are definitely some questions you shouldn't ask, like how old they are, or if they've ever been married.
No matter how awkward it might seem, Waichler recommends letting your therapist know you're having these feelings. “The therapist must know this so they can use them in therapy to understand why they've occurred and give insights on how to manage them,” she explains.
> Therapists usually take their cue from the patient.
We will steer clear of saying hi unless our patient indicates in some way that it is OK. You are free to make the choice that feels right to you at the time. There is no judgment either way.
Other things to avoid during a therapy session include: asking about other confidential conversations with other clients; showcasing violent emotions; or implying any romantic or sexual interest in your therapist.
In almost all cases, your personal information is held in strict confidence. Only in extreme cases will your therapist need to break confidentiality to keep you or others safe. Overall, therapy is most effective when the client feels safe.
Hands. Your client's hands can give you clues about how they're reacting to what comes up in the session. Trembling fingers can indicate anxiety or fear. Fists that clench or clutch the edges of clothing or furniture can suggest anger.
According to new research, 72 percent of therapists surveyed felt friendship toward their clients. 70 percent of therapists had felt sexually attracted to a client at some point; 25 percent fantasized about having a romantic relationship.
They won't tell you that. It's too dangerous. A therapist will almost never say, “I love you,” even if they feel or think it. Therapists know that the therapy relationship can be confusing, and it's not unusual for clients to get the wrong idea and fall in love with their therapists.
While your therapist will have questions for you in order to get a fuller understanding of your experience and goals for therapy, they're not going to dive right into the tough questions straight away.
Can You Be Friends With a Former Therapist? While not common, a friendship can develop when you've finished therapy. There are no official rules or ethical guidelines from either the American Psychological Associated or American Psychiatric Association regarding friendships with former clients.
It is never appropriate for a therapist to speak about themselves at length. In therapy, the focus should always be on the patient. As a general rule, it is inappropriate for the therapist to make any therapy session all about themselves.
None of the ethics boards that regulate mental health professionals specifically prohibit the use of touch or view it as unethical. There are times when your therapist may believe that it's more harmful to you not to initiate a hug. In some cases, nonsexual, therapeutic touch may be beneficial.
It's OK to pull up a client's personal website or Facebook page during a therapy session to see pictures of his or her children or to better understand a personal crisis he's coping with, says Barnett. But spying just because you can is inappropriate, he says.
Your therapist's relationship with you exists between sessions, even if you don't communicate with each other. She thinks of your conversations, as well, continuing to reflect on key moments as the week unfolds. She may even reconsider an opinion she had or an intervention she made during a session.
After you realize that transference is very common and not shameful, talk about your feelings with your therapist. Professing your love (or whatever emotion you're feeling) may be easier said than done, but it can help your therapist understand your issues and help you get the most out of your therapy.
It's okay to ask your therapist about their life. Any questions you have in therapy are valid and are likely relevant to the therapeutic process. Whether your therapist answers the question and shares personal information can depend on their individual personality, philosophy, and approach to your treatment.
Scanning our body for tightness, emotion, specific sensations such as a sinking gut can help provide insight into how we experience the world and provide direction for steps going forward. A therapist is not a keeper of all the right answers and does not intuitively know what is best for you.
Unless you share your thoughts and feelings with your therapist, they won't be able to help you as effectively. You may feel that something bad might happen if you tell your therapist your scariest thoughts, however, it is important to realize that having intrusive thoughts does not mean you are a bad person.
Back to Fictional Reader's question about why it may be difficult to look a therapist in the eyes. Some possible root causes range from guilt, shame, anxiety, low self-esteem, shyness, past abuse, depression or autistic spectrum disorders to varying cultural norms and cognitive overload.
“I feel like I'm talking too much.”
If you go into therapy that day and have a lot to say, allow yourself to speak what's on your mind. Instead of feeling bad for “talking too much,” you could instead say something like, "I have a lot I need to share. I appreciate you listening.
It is highly inappropriate for a therapist to tell you they love you at your very first session. It is common for many clients to come to (platonic) love their therapist, and, vice versa after a relationship has been established.