While it's true that there are clear similarities between BPD and NPD, the conditions are ultimately very different. Comparing borderline personality disorder vs narcissism reveals that while they do have some overlapping symptoms, there are also several aspects that make them distinct from one another.
Based on overlapping symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) are often mistaken for one another.
A person with BPD will seek to attach themselves to others in order to escape feelings of worthlessness, but a narcissist will exploit people for personal gain.
People with covert NPD are sensitive to rejection and have a high sense of entitlement, so their self-esteem is threatened by not getting their way. BPD self-esteem is at threat when they're abandoned, whether that abandonment is real or imagined.
In fact many people have been wrongly diagnosed with BPD during narcissistic abuse when they didn't know they were being abused. A LOT of people actually. That's why for many people with BPD they don't relate to the stigmatized version of BPD that you read about. This is because they don't have BPD they have C-PTSD.
BPD-diagnosed people are typically more prone to impulsive and self-destructive behavior, while those with NPD are more likely to exhibit grandiose behavior and a sense of entitlement. This is why when a narcissist's ego is wounded—what we'd call narcissistic injury,—the mental repercussions can be extreme for them.
Asperger's Disorder is often misdiagnosed as Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), though evident as early as age 3 (while pathological narcissism cannot be safely diagnosed prior to early adolescence). In both cases, the patient is self-centered and engrossed in a narrow range of interests and activities.
It's a technique often used by those with narcissistic and/or borderline personality disorders to deflect any responsibility from themselves.
According to Elinor Greenberg, PhD, “Borderline and Narcissistic individuals often fall in love because they are at approximately the same level with regard to their “Intimacy Skills.” They both are likely to be in the early stages of learning how to successfully maintain intimate relationships.
Some of the symptoms of BPD are also symptoms of other conditions, which can lead to a misdiagnosis. Examples of these symptoms include impulsivity, shame, anger, feelings of emptiness, intense emotions and suicidal thoughts. Conditions that have many of the same symptoms as BPD include: Bipolar disorder.
In truth, the Narcissist is no match for the Borderline. It doesn't matter how smart or powerful he is, she'll turn his world upside-down to where he could lose his entire fortune, acquire a serious disease, and become a shadow of his former self.
People with BPD score low on cognitive empathy but high on emotional empathy. This suggests that they do not easily understand other peoples' perspectives, but their own emotions are very sensitive. This is important because it could align BPD with other neurodiverse conditions.
The most official of the narcissism tests, the Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI), is commonly used to determine if someone displays narcissistic behaviors.
Most recent theories have focused on the link between narcissism and negative childhood experiences, such as physical or sexual violence, neglect, or rejection [10,11].
The actions of people who have BPD can indeed feel manipulative. However, the word 'manipulative', with its pejorative suggestions of malicious scheming, does not capture the true nature of BPD-spurred behavior.
- anyone who is important to them and who, inevitably will let them down. So when you cancel a date, miss their birthday, give them short shrift, choose a movie they hate, tell them you don't like their cooking or criticise their haircut, they will react.
Those who have BPD tend to be very intense, dramatic, and exciting. This means they tend to attract others who are depressed and/or suffering low self-esteem.
It is important to remember that while having a relationship with a person with BPD can be challenging, they are not intentionally trying to hurt you. Rather, they lack the ability to understand and cope with their emotional pain, which causes them to act in ways that hurt others.
It can be an attempt to gain control or power over the other person. By shutting down communication and emotional intimacy, the stonewalling partner expresses that they do not value the other person's feelings or perspective. This behavior may cause emotional distress and can be classified as emotional abuse.
Rejection Sensitivity
People with BPD are very sensitive to rejection. They may lie or exaggerate to cover mistakes or to maintain an overly positive image so that others will not reject them.
Narcissism is not a symptom of BPD listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5). However, as many as 40% of people with BPD may also have narcissistic personality disorder,4 so people with BPD may also show signs of narcissism.
Often, the person with BPD will react towards loved ones as if they were the abusers from their past, and take out vengeance and anger towards them. When the person with BPD feels abandoned, they can become abusive or controlling as a way to defend against feelings of abandonment or feeling unworthy.
Suffering from depression, PTSD, or substance abuse disorder can mimic NPD. One has to consider all symptoms and possibilities before assigning an explanation or excuse for someone's behavior.
Narcissistic problems are common in BPD and can present in multiple ways, including with a prominence of inferiority and fragility notably different from NPD described in the DSM-5. 2. Evidence-based treatments for BPD can be adapted to address narcissistic issues.
People who we might consider to be mild narcissists may be seen as very confident, exaggerate their skills or abilities, or appear somewhat arrogant.