The main difference is that with quiet BPD, you internalize emotional struggles and episodes. While those with BPD have intense impulsivity, anger outbursts, and episodes of anxiety and depression that are obvious to those around them, turning anger inward is more typical with quiet BPD.
Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a severe mental disorder, characterized by a pervasive pattern of instability in affect, cognition (i.e., self-image), interpersonal relationships, and impulsive behaviour [1]. Impulsivity and emotion dysregulation are core features of BPD [1,2,3].
Individuals living with quiet BPD may have decreased levels of empathy, high conflict relationships, clinginess and fear of abandonment, adds Dr. Lira de la Rosa. “The combination of these symptoms can lead to unstable interpersonal relationships, low self-esteem and periods of depression.”
The main difference between classic BPD and quiet BPD is that a person with classic BPD externalises their emotions through explosive outbursts, whereas one with quiet BPD directs those outbursts inwards, hiding their suffering.
With quiet BPD, you'll likely try to hide these symptoms from others, resulting in intense periods of anger, guilt, or shame directed toward yourself. You may hide impulsive behaviors or try to repress your moods. You might also withdraw or isolate from others.
The main difference is that with quiet BPD, you internalize emotional struggles and episodes. While those with BPD have intense impulsivity, anger outbursts, and episodes of anxiety and depression that are obvious to those around them, turning anger inward is more typical with quiet BPD.
Whereas the typical presentation of BPD involves angry outbursts and obvious and outward self destructiveness, those with quiet BPD have internalized emotional episodes2 (they turn their anger inward). For this reason, quiet BPD tends to go undiagnosed or is misdiagnosed.
While people with quiet BPD often seem fine outwardly, they are struggling inside with feelings of intense loneliness, shame, or self-criticism. BPD is estimated to affect about 1.6% of the population at any one time. However, some estimates put the percentage closer to 6%.
People with BPD feel firmly attached to their favorite person and may depend on them for comfort, reassurance, and guidance. In many cases, someone with BPD may rely entirely on their favorite person. As a result, they may idealize them and expect them to always be available.
For someone with BPD, the favorite person is deemed the most important person in their life. This person can be anyone, but it's often a romantic partner, family member, good friend, or another supportive person (like a coach, therapist, or teacher).
For many folks with BPD, a “meltdown” will manifest as rage. For some, it might look like swinging from one intense emotion to another. For others, it might mean an instant drop into suicidal ideation. Whatever your experience is, you're not alone.
Persons with BPD do not choose manipulation. It mostly happens to them. The way they experience their own emotions in a given situation involving significant others pushes them to resort to manipulative activities.
ESTPs and ESFPs are the most impulsive personality types. They both live in the moment and don't often think things through before making a decision. Considering the potential consequences is not a priority for them, so they often act on impulse.
Constant changes of mind.
People with BPD might find that they constantly change their mind about things, whether it's their feelings towards the people around them, or other areas of their life, such as their goals, ambitions or sexuality.
Dating someone with borderline personality disorder can be challenging. Your partner may have major difficulties with strong emotions, drastic mood swings, chronic fear of abandonment, and impulsive behaviors that can strain your relationship with chaos and instability.
What others perceive as a simple mistake to be brushed off, people with BPD might perceive as a serious wrongdoing. You might hold onto a grudge for days, or until the person has apologized sufficiently.
Unlike typical BPD, individuals with quiet BPD internalize symptoms of anxiety, anger, and emptiness. Quiet BPD is challenging to treat but can be improved and effectively managed with treatment. Find a supportive therapist that can help with BPD.
Individuals with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPDs) become overwhelmed and incapacitated by the intensity of their emotions, whether it is joy and elation or depression, anxiety, and rage. They are unable to manage these intense emotions.
Symptoms of personality disorder are: Moody, Criticizing everyone, Overreacting, Intimidating others, and Dominance over another person. A borderline personality disorder is the hardest to treat.
Individuals with cPTSD tend to have a more stable sense of Self but struggle with consistent feelings of low self-worth, guilt, and shame. Individuals with BPD, on the other hand, have a more unstable sense of Self – they may not know who they are at their core and frequently change their interests and hobbies.
When stressed, people with borderline personality disorder may develop psychotic-like symptoms. They experience a distortion of their perceptions or beliefs rather than a distinct break with reality. Especially in close relationships, they tend to misinterpret or amplify what other people feel about them.
BPD Anger Triggers
In some cases, the level of rage can lead to violence. Rage in an individual with BPD can occur suddenly and unpredictably. BPD anger triggers can include an intense fear of being alone. Two other BPD anger triggers include a fear of rejection and quickly changing views.