They know how to draw in others and before we have time to take a breath and recognize the narcissist for what she is, we might already be under her spell. Perhaps it is not surprising, but researchers found that narcissists tend be more physically attractive than average.
A key trait of narcissists is confidence – they are attractive because they think of themselves as attractive. They believe in their own value, so this confidence and charisma become qualities that pull others in, that makes them the life and soul of the party.
Key points. Evolutionary theory suggests that, due to their fitness advantages, attractive individuals are more likely to feel entitled and behave selfishly. The “what is beautiful is good” theory suggests attractive people are judged favorably and they confirm the stereotype by behaving positively.
Previous research has indicated that individuals high in narcissism tend to particularly value their attributes in domains such as physical attractiveness (Bleske-Rechek et al., 2008; Gabriel et al., 1994), intelligence (e.g., Gabriel et al., 1994), and leader-like status Judge et al., 2006), that is, regarding agentic ...
In summary: Beauty is often indicative of evolutionary advantages (e.g., health, fitness, fertility) and therefore, desired. This gives attractive individuals greater bargaining power. Consequently, they feel entitled, believe they can/should get whatever they want, and behave selfishly.
Many narcissists pride themselves on being expert lovers who can give a partner multiple orgasms and the best experience of their lives. The only downside to this is that narcissists might expect their partners to rhapsodize over their lovemaking skill, and may even prompt partners to discuss this in awkward detail.
Narcissistic admiration is also associated with being perceived as attractive and competent (e.g. Holtzman & Strube, 2010) and the concept is positively related to extraversion (Leckelt et al., 2018), self-assured demeanor, and engagement (Back, 2018).
Narcissists are attracted to certain types of people. Rather than weak, vulnerable people, they tend to go for the strong-willed and talented. They are also attracted to people who reflect well on themselves.
The narcissist stares to gain dominance over you. The stare is meant to make you feel uncomfortable and make you feel as if you are in danger or doing something wrong. The narcissist never wants you to feel comfortable in your life because it will make you much harder to control and manipulate.
Similarly, narcissists use a sparse and unpredictable pattern to dole out treats such as praise, attention, money and opportunities. Every once in a while a narcissist will say something nice to you, do something for you, or bestow his or her charm or attention on you. The rewards seem magnified because they are rare.
There are four types of people who narcissists tend to be attracted to, according to Arluck: People who are impressive in some way, either in their career, hobbies and talents, their friendship circles, or family. Someone who will make the narcissist feel good about themselves, through compliments or gestures.
In other words, narcissistic perfectionists see themselves as special and as unique, and these individuals demand perfection of those around them in a very critical way.
These findings suggest that physical appearance reflects narcissists' personality, preoccupation with good looks, and desire to be the center of attention, and serves as a vehicle with which to promote their status.
Someone who is highly empathic might be drawn to narcissists, and vice versa, as narcissists rely on being the sole focus of their partner's attention.
You're empathetic and caring
Empaths and highly sensitive people can be more susceptible to the charm of those who have NPD or narcissistic qualities, says Zinn.
In fact, the eyebrows alone can reveal narcissistic traits in people, research reveals. Grandiose narcissists have thicker and denser eyebrows and people automatically pick up on this cue. Across a series of studies, hundreds of participants were asked to look at pictures of people with varying degrees of narcissism.
Narcissists tend to display exaggerated body language and facial expressions. The 1990 study on conversational narcissism also found that narcissists tend to be overly dramatic in their hand gestures and facial expressions. They may also speak in a loud tone of voice.
Their eyes go from their natural colour into something so dark, so devoid of any human emotion, you become paralysed. This narcissistic stare is often referred to as a sociopathic stare, “death stare”, or “reptilian stare”, and is described as “pure evil”.
Holtzman and Strube put it this way: It is possible that narcissists have higher-than-average positive illusions, even above and beyond their higher-than-average attractiveness.
Cerebral Narcissists. As discussed earlier, the word somatic relates to the body. Therefore, somatic narcissists are obsessed with their physical appearance and weight, often securing self-worth from their body image. On the other hand, cerebral narcissists gain their sense of value from their intellect.
Put Your Needs First. Narcissists make others feel guilty about being happy because they expect everyone to put the narcissist's happiness first. If you're not constantly praising them or accepting their criticisms that make them feel superior, they won't be satisfied.
One of the most common misconceptions is that narcissists only look for emotionally dependent partners who lack confidence and self-esteem. In fact, narcissists are often attracted to strong, confident, and self-assured women.
Highly narcissistic men feel emotional distress rather than delight when viewing pictures of themselves, according to new research, which may help us understand how narcissism works in our social media age.
Sexual narcissists typically demonstrate a lack of empathy for their partner's needs in an effort to serve their own intimacy needs. They may do so while engaging in aggressive behavior, or more generally by ignoring their partner's requests or preferences in order to prioritize their own.