Middle children are associated with weaker self-esteem, and experts are rightfully concerned about this. On the other hand, middle children are far less likely to be narcissistic than their elder or younger siblings. Studies show they can cope with rejection quite well as a result.
Result: All of the narcissistic personality traits, except one (“Is interpersonally exploitative “) were significantly more prevalent among first-born children (p<0.05).
Narcissistic personality disorder affects more males than females, and it often begins in the teens or early adulthood. Some children may show traits of narcissism, but this is often typical for their age and doesn't mean they'll go on to develop narcissistic personality disorder.
Middles are used to not getting their own way, and so they become savvy, skillful manipulators. They can see all sides of a question and are empathetic and judge reactions well. They are more willing to compromise, and so they can argue successfully. Since they often have to wait around as kids, they're more patient.
The middle child often feels the need to compete with both the younger and older sibling for parental attention. They might compete for attention between siblings, as they risk being ignored by one or the other. As they find themselves in the middle of everything, they may also become the peacemaker.
Narcissism tends to emerge as a psychological defence in response to excessive levels of parental criticism, abuse or neglect in early life. Narcissistic personalities tend to be formed by emotional injury as a result of overwhelming shame, loss or deprivation during childhood.
Here are some narcissism red flags to look out for: Lacking empathy. They seem unable or unwilling to have empathy for others, and they appear to have no desire for emotional intimacy. Unrealistic sense of entitlement.
Middle children are good at compromise (they have had to learn to be) and usually end up with someone most like them, but can really pair well with anyone. Middle children tend to be more satisfied with marriage in general, but they seem to pair best with spouses who are the youngest in their family.
The middle child
Stereotype: Social butterfly, peacekeeper, fairness-obsessed.
Middle childhood is a stage where children move into expanding roles and environments. Children begin to spend more time away from their family and spend more time in school and other activities. As they experience more of the world around them, children begin to develop their own identity.
Social learning theory holds that children are likely to grow up to be narcissistic when their parents overvalue them: when their parents see them as more special and more entitled than other children (9).
Based on psychodynamic theory, it was hypothesized that firstborn children were expected to score highest, but statistical significance was not found for an association between narcissism and birth order.
Most children, however, grow out of the behavior while it seems to linger for others. One of the characteristics is that a child needs to display the signs of narcissism five years prior to their eighteenth birthday in order to meet the full standard.
Narcissists tend to display exaggerated body language and facial expressions. The 1990 study on conversational narcissism also found that narcissists tend to be overly dramatic in their hand gestures and facial expressions. They may also speak in a loud tone of voice.
Signs that a child may be a narcissist include a lack of empathy; unrealistic sense of self-importance; lack of recognition of attention and admiration; and an overall struggle in social and family relationships.
Tragically, narcissism is often the radioactive gift that keeps on giving from one generation to the next. A dysregulated mother may pass on her NPD to her son, who repeats the pattern through abusive behaviors with his own children, who in turn continue the cycle with their children.
Based on overlapping symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) are often mistaken for one another. The two personality disorders even have a rate of co-occurrence of about 25 percent, according to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI).
To compensate for a perceived lack of attention, middle children may either act rebellious or try to people please. Their behavior is somewhat based off of their older sibling's personality. For example, if the older sibling is structured and responsible, the middle child might rebel to draw some of the attention away.
Middle children may have trouble feeling equal to their siblings in parental relationships. The older sibling often holds more responsibilities, and the younger sibling is well taken care of by the parents. The middle child isn't given as much attention as either.
They tend to feel left out
“They serve no clear family function. Thus, they may receive less attention from parents and oftentimes feel ignored and neglected.” In the eyes of the middle child, oldest siblings reap all the privileges and the babies get away with everything and need so much help.