It really comes down to the style of kissing, and the preference of the person being kissed. Some like it wet and sloppy, and others think that's gross! A lot of people are nervous about the first kiss, so that can make it awkward.
Not every first kiss, though, is a great kiss. They can be awkward, especially if the moment is not right or even forced. Even still, we are physically wired to tell the difference between a bad kiss from a good kisser and a "this does nothing for me" lipsmack.
That first passionate kiss causes dopamine to spike in the brain. It's a give-me-more insatiable hormone all about pleasure; when we first fall in love and have those over-the-moon thoughts, that's dopamine. Incidentally, it affects the same part of the brain as cocaine, making us crave for more.
It's no big deal. Kissing takes some practice, and no one aces a new skill on the first try. If there's ever a time to be gentle with yourself, this is it.
Interestingly, this is largely agreed upon across generations. No need to wait for the official first date to get a little face time, however. Americans agree kids are ready for their first kiss at age 15 (15.1 on average), while on average, they had theirs at age 14.5.
If you give someone a peck, you're leaning in for a simple, light kiss. It might not be incredibly passionate, but don't worry, it's still a super intimate gesture. More often than not, your first kiss with someone new is likely to be a peck — it signals attraction and romantic interest, without being too overwhelming.
Your first kiss won't be a 20 minute make-out session. You will most likely have a five second (if that) kissing session that will consist of two lips puckered that touch each other with some suction. That's it. You'll release, look into each other's eyes and you'll think it's magical.
It turns out, your first romantic kiss is likely to be etched in your memory forever. More than 90{1fa3f09e2bb6719cc6653a34c4038b8f8c4ebd7a060bb979778d4383cd5dd806} of all people remember the details of their first kiss and, research points out, even more vividly than when they lost their virginity.
So, 10 seconds is how short the ideal kiss is, according to the survey.
"Your biological stress system is actually activated when you have your first kiss," Seiter says. "But, this doesn't mean you're stressed out. You'll experience increased heart rate, sweating, or butterflies in your stomach; a physiological excitement response."
It's perfectly normal to be nervous before that delicious first kiss. It means that you're excited, and that's a good thing. And just remember, chances are they're just as nervous as you are.
Men often don't worry about what a kiss means.
He likely isn't thinking about the timing of your first kiss. He just wants to know if you had a great time. If you don't want to kiss him, reassure him by saying, “I had an amazing time tonight and would love to see you again.”
You experience an adrenaline rush: When you kiss someone for the first time, your body will release a burst of adrenaline (the fight-or-flight chemical) which increases your heart rate, boosts your energy levels and gets the blood flowing.
Your first kiss might feel like a high-pressure situation — a moment you'll think a lot about before it happens. But that doesn't mean it should be something you need to worry about. The most important thing is to make sure that both you and the person you're kissing are happy and comfortable.
The anticipation of having our first kiss can make us feel like a bag of excitement, anxiety, curiosity and self-doubt, all jostling around in our tummies like butterflies. It's perfectly normal to feel this way; in fact, most of us do.
A long kiss releases dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin, feel-good chemicals that will make him smile. A single smile produces endorphins, another hormone that lifts his mood. Endorphins also create a “feedback loop” that will make him smile over and over.
The first kiss is a pivotal moment. It's the primary way to tell if your relationship is romantic or platonic. The quality and timing of that first kiss can be a deal-maker, or breaker. A couple's smooch style can be in perfect harmony from the very beginning.
Slow and steady does it
Try to relax and move slowly to avoid those awkward face-crashes. Going slowly also centers you in your body and allows you to check in with how you feel. That's all key to being a good kisser. According to Chavez, it's important not to think of kissing as just a means to an end.
What to say after a kiss? Anything you want, or nothing at all! A simple smile is often more than enough. Thanks!
Though the average age for young people to experience a first kiss is fifteen, there is absolutely no reason to rush into it because “everyone else is doing it” or you want to feel “normal.” After all, what good is a kiss if it comes with a side of regret?
It's never too late to have your first kiss, to love and be loved, or to get in “the game.” I think you already know that, or at least suspect it, but here's me saying: You're right. It always seems impossible until it happens. For now, take that pressure off yourself, and enjoy being 20.